The Inheritors

sonnet

 

 

 

The Inheritors.

 

A silent world where no bird sings

A world devoid of living things.

Only the fittest could survive.

The Roaches adapted and still thrive.

The human race has long since died.

Killed by their overweening pride

Although they thought they were the best

 they are as dead as all the rest.

Ignoring Mother Natures rule

 a race of self destructive fools.

They meddled with and altered genes.

Creating hybrid in betweens.

The end result is as you see.

 Cockroaches rule triumphantly.

 

29/10/2009

http:// blog.my space.com/poeticpiers

Reviews

[Tate Morgan]

AN EDUCATION ISN'T CHEAP i CANT STOP LAUGHING AT THE POWER OF YOUR PEN YOU ARE THE ENGLISH MARK TWAIN WHO'S WIT FLOWS LIKE THE BRUSH OF VAN GOUGH!
TATE

[Kieran James McGovern]

You have some brilliant pieces on here, not the kind that beats you over the head, but you read it and see some very stark reasoning in it. Here--the greatest enemy of humans, cockroaches- are the sole survivors. And haven't we done so much to destroy them, along while destroying everything else, whether intentionally or not. Yet only the subject of hatred remains.

[R.R.Louderback]

Rhyming couplets can be painful... I often run them onto a single line for "leonine verse" just for fun. It sometimes adds a little dignity to a work that otherwise seems flippant.

I liked this quite a lot. the message is an important - and depressing - one.

Well-executed as ever, the rhymes are solid.

I think that in line 9 Mother Natures should be a possessive - Mother Nature's...

In line 12 I would have hyphenated in-betweens. I'm not sure if that would be correct or not. It probably works either way.

Good job!