Steering Mr. Crazy

Above all, we cannot afford not to live in the present. - Thoreau

my dear sweet pet

please pass me a serviette

i'll spread it 'pon my lap

so i don't get the naughty clap

pour me some tea

i'll sip it with a prim and proper, outstretched pinkie

pass me the champagne

don't uncork any disdain

tell me about the summer home

with all its polished chrome

take me for a jaunt in the benz

before our gilded time together ends

hurry, before a different finger extends

light my exploding cigar

take me far

make sure my bleached white jacket is straight and tied

we'll stop on the way to drop off dr. jeckyll and pick up mr. hyde

we'll honk a cornucopian horn of plenty

dining on pasta al-dente

printing our own hundred dollar bills, to hell with twenty

thank you my dear sweet pet

for serving the puckered, salad vinaigrette

for keeping my humidor wet

and wiping away all my sweat

for being such a good hostess

the one great at inflicting psychosis

not for driving miss daisy

more like steering mr. crazy

Author's Note

"A man is rich in proportion to the number of things which he can afford to let alone." - Thoreau