Close, But Off The Mark

When you knock, ask to see God - none of the servants. - Thoreau

i sit in the park

alone with the geese

pecking crumbs and leaving our marks

sharing our loneliness and woes

all of us practicing our stone throws

i ask them if they've seen god lately

the only sound, off in the distance, being an uneasy dog that barks

it's starting to get dark

i hear my dead mother calling me to come home

excuse me

i have to go now

somewhere, somehow

as a hued palette of sunset rubs its last spark

as a nearby, leaning angel cries out, "hark"

"your stones are close but none have hit their mark"

causing me to question why i still go there

wondering where time went

the high tide

and mom

not to mention my hair

Author's Note

“Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in. I drink at it; but while I drink I see the sandy bottom and detect how shallow it is. Its thin current slides away, but eternity remains.” - Thoreau

Reviews

[Amanda Renee]

Pete, there is so much beauty and depth in your poem, I REALLY enjoyed it. I love how you start on on even playing field with the geese and the lines, "i ask them if they've seen god lately
the only sound, off in the distance, being an uneasy dog that barks". I love how you bothered to ask them and that they did not answer seems so perfect. I can visualize myself being within your poem as a witness to all of it. Thank you so much for sharing this gem!

[Pete]

such a kind review. sounds like you really got into it. thanks so much for taking the time amanda.