Heart?

a broken poem about a broken heart, but not in the way we understand it to be.

Cold thrill and tingle,

The jingle of

My heart.

My heart is

Is

Still

Still together.

Held together by pieces

Pieces of string.

Strung.

My frozen heart is strung together,

Twisting in the wind.

The wind

Blows

On my far strung

Heart.

Tossing

Tossing my stone-cold heart about

About the sky in searches of

Searches of

What?

It does not know.

I search

floating on my last string,

I search for something

Something beyond my reach.

How far is

My understanding?

I do not get

It.

 

What do I

Not comprehend?

 

What is there

To get?

I am strung up by my fragile heart,

with a question.

My heart has

Has a

Question.

What is

 A

Heart?

Author's Note

what is the feeling you get from this poem?

Reviews

[C. Rose]

Like Shadow Stealer, this piece has a unique idea.
However, it doesn't work as well as Shadow Stealer. This one seems to get a bit rambly and trail off.
I was with you through the string, and far strung and tosses and wind. But when you get to searching and not understanding and the question - I don't see the connection to your idea of a stitched up heart.
I somewhat understand the jingling, like perhaps the stitched up heart is a bunch of nuts and bolts and scraps tied together - but you didn't say that so I don't completely understand the connection between jingling and the main metaphor. Ah! I see in the keywords you have Ice and Shatter.

I like the jumbled/stitched up heart idea. It takes the overused idea of a broken heart and takes it in a half silly half aweinspiring direction.

I recommend showing a clearer connection between the metaphor and the second half of the poem, and explain why there is jingling. A different solution would be to cut the second half of the poem. A third solution would be to bring up strings again at the very end of the poem.

[Rosezelene Ersa]

For this poem, it was more like a free write. I did not start out with a whole idea, which is why it's very rambly; I tend to find some very interesting ideas when I free write, which you can see about halfway through where the heart is strung apart and stitched. the whole point of me writing this was to show a little insight into my writing process WITHOUT polishing, or rewriting, or editing of any kind. It was my first attempt at such a thing, and I do think it turned out well for just basically being a jumbled up lot of thoughts.

[C. Rose]

I agree, I have a few poems that weren't planned ahead, that I just sort of went with. It's such a great feeling when they turn out well.