my new bestfriend

he hasnt a name or a face

you cant see him

but you know hes there

you might not realize it

but he's coming

he hides in plain view

he hides in the shadows

he lurks in your dreams

he won't be satisfied until

he hears your screams

my new bestfriend

DEATH

Reviews

[poddar kushal]

you are very much wellcome.
"he has many "friends"

and gets more bye the minute " it is wonder full. but i rather have a serious piece on this concept from you. i do not think you were serious while writting these wonder of words.

[eaglefeather]

Hang in there, We have all been friends with death before, but sometimes he isn't the friend we wish to keep all our lives.

[Lydia Shutter]

Profoundly disturbing poetry....well written, but the subject matter curls the hair on my arms! Lydia

[My Name is Brenda and I..]

All of our poems are good because they're our's. Remember that the poem you don't write will never be written. The first thing I do when I read a new poem is try to imagine what caused the poet (you are a poet) to write it. Then I ask myself if there is more story there. Sometimes what I want to say doesn't work in a poem so I write it first as "flash fiction" or a journal entry. Then I edit the longer piece into a poem. Then I read it outloud. That way I can hear the rhythm and the breath of the poem. The most important thing is NEVER to diminish or criticize your writing. The world is full of harsh critics who will do that for us. Keep writing. I hope you and your poems will be nourished here in the Cafe. Brenda

[Bhavya Kaushik]

This is a very interesting piece you have!!!

I loved the way you ended up the piece..

"he hides in the shadows

he lurks in your dreames

he won't be satisfied

untill he hears your screams

my new best friend
DEATH"---Its very much appealing to the reader...


But...I found the entire piece more of a prose than a poetry...
so..you can improve the flow of the piece!


But...overall...its written is a beautiful way!!

An awesome read it is..

Thanks a lot for posting it here..

Keep writing..


-Bhavya..

[Carole A. Ward]

Interesting piece. I've corrected a few spelling errors in my notes, and other than that, it's a direct work. Keep writing!

Namaste.