imagine

that stupid notebook, with the word 'imagine' lilting down the front of it's yellow cover... and the words 'i love you' written in his scrawl on the inside back.

i sat there today and ripped out all the pages i still needed.

then i picked up a pen and wrote in large letters across every empty page.
i am incapable of wasting paper and therefore could never just throw it away... else i would have months before this day.

on every page i told him how i felt. how he hurt me. how he broke me. i forgot about rhythm and rhyme... about meter and sound... and i wrote ugly words with ugly penmanship... the whole thing was not pretty at all.

i'm tired of trying to make it all pretty.

sometimes it's not. sometimes life is ugly. sometimes people are ugly.

and sometimes you just need to write all over the pages and throw it away.

Reviews

[L. L. Jacobson]

THIS IS AMAZING.
I became your paper.

[Flint Easthood]

Funny... when I read the title I thought of a song, Take It All Away by Ryan Cabrera (it's a great song, one of my favorite)...
I don't know... We all have ways of blowing steam... in your case, it's the amazing ability to convert your feelings into words... but it's not as easy as that, is it?... feelings don't just disappear if you write them down or say them aloud... it's just the first step to finding a greater truth...
Making someone the center of your universe is a sure way to disappointment and heartache...
People can't be what we want, even if they wanted to...
In the end, you just have to settle to a life time of respect, kindness, tenderness and devotion...
That thing people call "love" is too overrated anyway... :)
Right?

[Jacob White Owl]

This is excellent! Very raw feel yet one can see the continuity within.

[Crystal]

i forgot about rhythm and rhyme... about meter and sound... and i wrote ugly words with ugly penmanship...

That's eye-opening! Maybe if I could do that then I could feel again and write something other than this drivel that keeps coming to my head?! I love this. I realize that it is a vent, a flow. But it is poetic in it's own way. Heartfelt, raw... brilliant!

[Pierce Franklin]

Don't really know how to review this, but I totally agree - "sometimes you just need to write all over the pages and throw it away."