don't know

Up late just lost in thoughts

Deep Inside I still know,that the lengths That I'll go will be for nothing. 

Because nothing I could ever say or do could change the facts!

So why do I continue to reach? I am okay with it one minute than the next......... It gets too real. I'm only fooling myself, well not even myself. Correction.. ..

                    I am lying to myself! But I still can not stop. I want to! Only because I know I will take it to heart at the end. And that will hurt. 

But deep inside I don't want to because I keep lying to myself again hoping that It won't be a lie! That It can come true, That we can be. How to separate reality from fantasy? When It all seems real. It's too much to even try to figure out and although I know In my heart that this is everything great, I see that It's only me!

Only me who sees more, It's not much of a stretch! Actually it's not a stretch at all. Life, love. None of this s**t is difficult, It's just as difficult as a person makes it. Whose to say I don't know what or how I FEEL!

I just realized this poem is not a poem and is my feelings bleeding on paper, *sigh*

It made sense at first, I even meant for it to be in stanza,

 proving that what you feel just has to spill where and how it lays. I don't want to be In love,

       I am In love, 

and every few moments it aches, 

Reviews

[AaronFreitas]

I love the way you express yourself... bleed your passion onto the paper :) Sometimes it helps just to get s**t out and get it off your chest. It wont necessarily fix it but take it from me it feels good to just let it go and get it out of your system. I loved your truth in this :)

[silent poet]

To be appreciated for just that? means everything I can't explain ! Thank you because I don't know just being a great person! My hardest part of breathing has always been feeling trapped in my own chest, soul and heart. Not being able to express myself because it makes others uneasy but when holding it in, then I'm not ok and uneasy. But that leaves me to think about all you said about accepting ourselves! So I will be who I am. Thank you so much for taking your time to read my thoughts, poetry and feels.. I truly appreciate you :)

[AaronFreitas]

Aww thanks my friend :)

[wordman]

i guess we have no control over our feelings, or emotions
and we lie to ourselves to avoid the pain truth might bring
great write

[silent poet]

Sad 😢 and true... I know I do. Lie to myself! But I'm getting there.. Thank you much !!

[wordman]

you are welcome camille

[silent poet]

:) :) ......

[wordman]

will read the rest of your rr`s when i get out of the shower,just got in from work

[silent poet]

I appreciate that wordman, :) after a long day to even give your time..

[wordman]

it is my pleasure camille