LYFE

guest bed.
the steady wicks hold steady flames

 

i'm laying steady
but i'm feeling shaky

 

the white lights, how they sparkle
and the salt water begins to spill from my glassy eyes

too much
too much
too much

running myself into the ground
i can smell the damp soil i'm surrounded in

 

i'm laying steady
i'm feeling less

 

dirt
begins to fall from the sky
covering me for burial

too much
i do too much
i've done too much

 

i'm back on the bed
the wicks are still steady
the flames are statuesque

i'm just a strung-out mess

and nothing can be worth all of this
no amount of money
there is no point is stretching myself so thin
because when i'm lying on the guest bed i am barely visible
i may just evaporate

 

from too much
too much

far

far

far

too much

 

LYFE,
it isn't spelled this way

nor is it

 supposed to be this way.....

Reviews

[Twilite Angel]

very nice write

[Krishna]

I really like the dreamy impressions, as if quick images imprinted, dude, it has such a pure fragility about it, very special flavor, you are such an artistic soul!

And maybe we never really do grow up, maybe it's healthy to have a strong inner child, and maybe, probably you already know that. Sweet deal, I'm going to read more of your work....

[Micheal Teal]

A simple yet profound piece. I enjoyed the embracing openness of your poetry. Your soul is painting a lyrical portrait that is unique and inspiring. Thank you for sharing your words and your lyfe. May yours be a ladder of consciousness where the winds of spirit blow softly that you may be transported to a state of pure relaxation where you can cultivate complete self acceptance.

[Lori]

Wonderfully visceral poem. It has that poetic something that can't be taught, but gets under the skin. You just feel the weight piling on and on, even the structure of the poem conveys this. I like the ending, because it seemed to me subletly hopeful. It's the subtle humor and defiance of spelling the word wrong and then saying "so what..." That little bit of defiance really redefines the poem in a good way.

[RaindropsRoses93]

I really love this and i love how you misspelled life to send a message. It is a very original way to show he darker part of life. You might want to use a capital at the beginning of your sentences but other than that it was amazing.

[AK]

You have a way of capturing emotions and feelings that most times leaves me speechless. This piece is a perfect example.
Now then, we have got to find a way to slow things down a bit for you so you can enjoy "lyfe" the way it was meant to be enjoyed.
Cool shoes in the photo by the way!

[RAWR!]

nice rach :D

you dissapear for a little while,
but when you come back you bring writings :)

and everytime they get deeper and more colourful.

[Owlecks]

I suppose you could spell "life" as LYFE. Who's to say which is right and which is wrong?

[Dezaraye]

Rachel, I love this! Your imagery here is super strong and really powerful. Brilliant write and brilliant spin on lyfe!

[Rain]

I love the orginality of this, the thought process,the line, the form. It worked. I liked it, a lot. Rain..