L'Anti

His heart was made of chocolate

His bones of crystallized sugar canes

His eyes of the creamiest cocoa sweet milk

Layer and layer of his skin came like strips of licorice

A diabetic fantasy

The silent killer of gluttony

Such a poignant taste

Additive venom like tar of a cigarette

That was all he was

A love made of toxins

Reviews

[Dargan]

Powerful stuff. I really enjoyed the way you held to the theme and I love the image of bones of crystalized sugar cane. The line "a diabetic fantasy" jumped out at me too. I'm not sure "ethereal" really fits where you have it, but I love the turn from sweetness which the reader will likely interpret as good to begin with, and then suddenly to toxins. I think maybe a different title so as not to give away the turn might be good. Great job overall!

[wolfie]

Thank you. I will take your words into consideration.

[Elaine]

Like tar of a cigarette, leaving a bitter aftertaste. And diabetes.

[Ja]

Isn't it interesting
That the sweetest things
Can the most destruction bring
Thank you kindly

[wolfie]

Yup, I'm glad you liked it!