I Wanna Love HIM

Expression of love for black men.

I Wanna Love H.I.M © 10/97

 

Bred into this life without asking without question

Usually one destined for all but settlin for less

He knows not

He’s blessed

And if he does he’s one in a million cuz

From poverty stricken, to white a*s lickin,

Up to diamond fingered countin,

And benjamins in his fountain

My guy has seen it, been it, done it,

But never won it

Peace of Mind!

Harmony in the dome

While worries comb

His regal locks, whether lied in, slicked in, kinked in,

Or dreaded in

The world spins

Around his being instead of with it only to be seeing

Youth as an unknown phenomenon

For the one I have crush

And creamy rush for

His experiences are metaphor

To H.I.M in anger, joy, or sadness

Human In Madness

Is what I call HIM

An affectionate way just to say

I understand Yo,

I feel you

Thought I don’t live you

I can still see you

Whether real bright or kinda dim

I just know I wanna love H.I.M

Yes, I know you’re no saint

You’ve been messed with and left with

A faint taint of poison

Runnin through your veins

While a weasel is guiding your reins

As if you’re a horse made to bite down on a bit

And can’t say s**t

Right, wrong, or just inquiring

Your voice is overshadowed by monolithic views

False racist fools

Or Federal dues

Taxin your loot, your seeds, your queens, and your demons

Sometimes you choose assimilation

You know, black probation

Coloring suburbia

Entering professions where nobody’s heard of ya

While courtesans are servin ya

You want to find something but look through closed doors

Participating in useless chores

Settlin minor scores

Day in and day out

In anger, joy, or sadness

You look past H.I.M

That Human In Madness

Regardless of this flawed stem

I still wanna love HIM

As you can probably tell he has a partner in crime

Smelling like the sweetest of wine

At times an asset or his only right hand for sure

Don’t misjudge Mi Amor

Through all the mishaps, spiritual unhealing, and rehealing

And continued rape of the souls

And mind f*****g through centuries

SHE was right there!

Been in it,

Trudged through it, and

Left to die with it

Giving birth to all that is possible in H.I.M

Hoping the best for H.I.M

Whether faltering or weak

Walked with AND behind H.I.M

So no matter the shatter

Of her varying existences that the average eye may see

It is her, her, her and most definitely Me

Till judgement day to infinity

No matter what obstacles lay astray

Know this tomorrow

Nest year

And Today

In Hate, Jealousy, Envy, Foreplay

Or Anger, Joy, and Sadness

I carry that Human In Madness

In my heart and in my swollen womb

He can always live in this tomb

F**k a diamond!

He’s my priceless gem

I

Wanna

Love

H.I.M !!!!

 

 

Author's Note

Grammar Errors Intentinal, Urban Vernacular

Reviews

[Annacate]

Hi Shoshannah,

I know that I already gave a quick review, but I'm not sure if it did your poem justice. I want to go back and tell you what stood out most for me. It's the way you contrasted falseness with reality. "F**k a diamond, I want H.I.M." The realness of it. There's no flowery sentimentality at all, yet even through her seemingly harsh words, her love comes across as so real. She's not in love with an image, she's in love with a flesh and blood man. A human being with struggles. You've got a real talent here.

[pinkunicorn]

i hope i will be as good as you are one day

[Annacate]

So powerful. Thank you for sharing.