Longer

A person's feeling to a close friend which stays hidden and untold.A feeling which the persona fear to be told because of friend zone.This remains hidden for the sake of the person to stay long.

Longer

Jude-Cipher

While the world keep on revolving around the sun,

While fish are swimming freely in the ocean,

While you are still in my life,

I wanna hold you tight

While sands still lies on the beaches,

While the leaves still stay on the trees,

So as our friendship,I wanna keep

That, I’m terribly playing safe

Keeping this hidden,

The feeling that I’m feeling,

Isn’t an easy way to pretend

Because I’m afraid

Once this feeling be told,

You won’t grow with me old

While crow isn’t yet white,

I will always tell you lie,

Lie that I’m not jealous

And being honest as pretentious

I wanna secretly cry

When you both are sweet up on high

And though I wanted to fight

But still I do not own the right

It’s a terrible way

And I know this is crazy

To sacrifice my feeling

Just to keep our friendship going

Nothing to do than to keep shut

Though deep within I’m breaking up

Why should it be you?

The truth is,I don’t wanna told you

Because I wanna stay longer with you

Author's Note

Say anything you want to say.I'm open for suggestions and comments.Thank you!

Reviews

[Chris]

You speak within this poem of how YOU are "dealing" with a person and the emotional impact it represents... Women talk through such issues.

As a poem the clarity of content is present but the flow of the language used - stumbles and stutters a bit. More practice writing, reading aloud, and having conversations will help you find the rhythm and patterns of usage.

[Jude-Cipher]

Thank You so much Chris!This would really help me as a young poet.I appreciate it.Yes,I would be doing what you had just taught me.Best regards,Chris!

[Chris]

anytime...

[Roger Turgeon]

Sounds like your afraid to tell someone how you feel. Better to speak and maybe find a warm welcome rather than stay silent in the cold. The rhyme scheme and grammar could use some touching up. Keep writing

[Jude-Cipher]

Thank You so much!

[Jason Shadows]

Keeping them close yet not wanting to let go but so close to some closure it's seems unreal while they lie. Only you will know when the time is when it comes drifting into the cosmos like a falling star in the night sky.
Great read.