FATHER SUN

I am child of Sun

 

 

When the candle is lit,

 

You know my father has gone away,

 

When the has candle melt,

 

My father says its his new day!

Author's Note

My father is all I got

Reviews

[Sunni Davis]

This is very short but it says alot; there are so many ways to look at this. I see the candle as dayling, your father as the sun. When he goes way, it becomes night and dark. Very nice.

[sonceotrok]

Yes you understood me Sunni! Thanku

[Lucky]

i think this can use a bit more substance. i'm not exactly getting any sort of message here. i think your topic is really good and it gives you a strong base that you still have to learn to develop!

[sonceotrok]

Lucky yeh i am tryin ...thanku

[Danielle Nicole]

Wonderfully written. Short, simple, yet packed with a story that plays out while you read. Nice work!

[sonceotrok]

Thanku Danielle u are kind woman

[sonceotrok]

Thank you DEVILS ANGEL
YOU were the first one to comment on my first poetry.

[Sukriti Suki]

So sweet. Short yet says a lot. Wonderful.

[sonceotrok]

Thanku Suki you are nice