Shooting Star

Chaucerian Rondel form. For a contest.

Another shooting star has passed me by

Shining tail of dreams speeding through space

Here then gone without a trace

 

Unfufilled wishes make mortals cry

And this dazzling entity never stays in one place

Another shooting star has passed me by

 

Worlds release a collective sigh

Wishes become strangers without a face

Disappearing at a heartbreaking pace

Another shooting star has passed me by

Author's Note

Form:

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aba
abba

This was fun! :D

Reviews

[ajasminewallflower]

Wonderful and its right in your element

[there is no more from m..]

amazing :) i liked it

[Salvatore Buttaci]

Congratulations on winning the Short Poem #3 Contest!

[Helen Crutchett]

A beautiful Rondel for the contest. Very well written!
Helena

[Rylan Batten]

very good message written in great prose. keep it up, you've got talent

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I really enjoyed the piece... a wonderfully creative way of describing how quickly dreams can fade if we don't act on them.

Wishes become strangers without a face
Disappearing at a heartbreaking pace

That part in particular really go to me...
your writing skills are top notch.

[Bud]

Very nicely done, Steph! Way to go! Just remember for every passing star, there will be many more to come your way!

[An owl on the moon]

This has such a stunning beauty, and the form is flawless. There is a life, a destiny that you speak of through these falling stars... Amazing write! (Chaucerian Rondel? Isn't Chaucer the guy in A Knight's Tale?)

[Owl]

I just got back from a pretty bad date, so this kinda sums up my feelings right now.

In that respect, good job. :)

Anyway, I like the chorus (or would that be refrain?) and it's got a nice sombre rhythm to it.