The Theft

War poem, sort of opens the eyes a bit. I hope

I began to die many years ago and have been dying since

An the fact it started when you came is no coincidence.

You've lost yourselves in a war you started

And I need not explain

You've brought this fear upon yourselves

This one, undying pain.

You took my life many years ago in a cruel, obnoxious theft.

War does not prove you are right my friends.

It confirms that you

                                    are left

Author's Note

I'm not too sure if I like that I repeated the 'many years ago' line, but it kind of fit. What do you think about starting a scentance with the word 'And' twice? I don't know if its just repeatative or catchy or what.....

Reviews

[PaulM2]

I enjoyed the rhythm of it. The wording may have been a bit repetitive at times but I feel like it was effective in maintaining what I took as a sort of driving rhythm, pushing your point and making it all come to rest on the last two words. I'll give it my thumbs up.

[PaulM2]

On a side note I read this all in my head in an Irish accent..maybe that helped..or I could be weird.

[just is]

Wow such a powerful read

[Bitter Overdose]

I can't even explain it, but something about this poem gives me shivers. I love it!

[Katelyn]

I love this poem. It has a lot of strong emotion and the last 2 lines are my favorite. Great job. Keep up the great work!