Secrets

I want to know your whole life story
Shining with all that glory
I can tell you all my deep dark secrets
Only hoping that you will keep it
I have seen a thousand faces
Traveled to amazing places
But all I want to do
Is be with you

Author's Note

Simple freestyle poem

Reviews

[emipoemi]

Not bad at all!! The flow is amazing, the progression and the message are great. You end it with absolute brilliance! My only comments are that the "all that" in Line 2 is a bit amateur and could easily be made more powerful with the right adjective (also an extra syllable wouldn't hurt - it would actually smooth out the musicality); and the "keep it" in Line 4 is grammatically correct given you have "secrets" in plural. If you can find a way to singularize "secrets" without marring the musicality then "keep it" would work. But other than that this is short, sweet, and powerful. Very well done!

[Einstein Noodle]

m yes simply stated ...but emotive ...for those who share secrets they know the bliss of just being together ... lovely little poem .. creates a scene and story in such short fashion ... nice read for me Talia ... welcome to the Cafe'
E.

[David Klay]

Would it be insulting to simply call this adorable? It truly is! :)

[Talia]

No, I take it as a compliment. :)
Thanks for reading!

[Crosby Idasa]

Nice, you just have to be with him. That gives your mind joy and happiness

[Karmee]

This is just so wonderful and simple. Awesome write

[Vin]

And it's simply good:)
keep going

[Wondering Mind]

Lucky are the ones who find The one... Simple, but nicely written in an easy-flowing rhyme

[Poet]

Though secrets is plural and the word it is singular I overlooked that. When someone is in your heart, he or she makes it flutter. Others around you become part of the scenery, so this is short but meaningful.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this reminds me of that saying...i traveled the world seeking what i needed, then came back home to find it.

i like the near rhyme with "secrets" and "it"---
expressive write.
j.