My Father's Life Ended Twice

My father's life ended twice:

First, on the day my mom passed away;

Next, when he took his last breath of air

Three months later to the day.

 

The year was 1998.

How long ago it seems! And yet

So many vivid memories

Make it a year I'll never forget.

 

Tangled up in straps and tubes

In ICU, my dad spent

His final month lying supine

While monitors beeped and tracked his descent.

 

Pneumonia for an emphysemic

Is not a kind and welcome friend.

A ventilator served as lungs

And breathed for Dad until the end.

 

A man who'd always loved ideas

And words, the poor guy had no choice:

Unable to speak because of equipment,

A pad of paper became his voice.

 

"You've got a strong heart," I said,

Trying to make his spirits rise.

"Too strong," he wrote. I looked away

So he wouldn't see the tears in my eyes.

 

While standing there, all I could see

Was a man who'd devoted many years

To serving others, challenging our brains,

Making us laugh, assuaging our fears.

 

I heard him reading us bedtime stories,

Correcting our grammar, playing word games,

Arguing politics with his friends,

Discussing Dickens, Hardy, and James.

 

I saw a man alone in a car,

Within the glow of a theater marquee,

Patiently waiting late at night

To pick up my friends and me.

 

I saw him working multiple jobs,

Fixing the plumbing, knocking down walls,

Remodeling the bathroom, and on the courts

Smacking the hell out of tennis balls.

 

Now in his deep blue eyes I could see

A question impossible to dismiss:

"Why after a life so full

Do we THEN have to end up like this?"

 

Any inkling of an answer

Was stifled with a grimace and frown

As death was tugging at his sleeve

And his body was slowly shutting down.

 

Life has bitter ironies

That we often bemoan or bewail.

We want to explain the inexplicable.

Our efforts are to no avail.

 

(8-12-16)

Reviews

[Phillip Francis]

Bob, this is well-written. I could help but shed a tear as I was overcome by the emotions conveyed in your words. I thought of my own father and grandfather. Thank you for sharing this piece.