How to Destroy a Democracy: A Twelve-Step Plan

If you would like to run a country

And run it with an iron fist

While thumbing your nose at democracy,

Then keep in mind the following list:

 

One. Once you're in office,

Defy the voters that you'd been wooing

By doing some of the things that you

Criticized your opponent for doing.

 

Two. Demonize the media.

Accuse them of grossly distorting

The truth. Call them the enemy,

And give no credence to what they're reporting.

 

Three. When matters don't go your way,

Resort to alternative facts and choose

Disinformation as the best way

To strengthen your base with far-fetched views.

 

Four. Give alt-right nationalists

Top positions on your team

And then belittle those who say

That your advisers are too extreme.

 

Five. Meet with the FBI

To clarify your expectations.

Tell them that they should knock down stories

And change ongoing investigations.

 

Six. Pressure heads of intelligence

Investigative committees to call

Reporters to tell them to alter reports.

Tell them "To hell with protocol!"

 

Seven. Downplay the roles of foreign

Countries in helping you win the race.

Discourage further investigations

By saying they're totally out of place.

 

Eight. Follow the expert advice

Of Vladimir Lenin, who would say,

"A lie told often enough

Becomes the truth." That works today.

 

Nine. Belittle judges and courts;

Belittle even allies and friends.

Stick your foot in your mouth even more

When you try to make amends.

Ten. It helps to criticize

The CIA and FBI.

Intimidate and discredit them,

And hang the agencies out to dry.

 

Eleven. Chip away at people's

Rights. Try to make them believe

That what you are doing is for their own good.

Remind them that the press can deceive.

 

Twelve. Continue campaign rallies

To stroke your ego; to prove you're liked.

Cover up the fact that your

Disapproval ratings have spiked.

 

A master con artist will know

How to take information and spin it.

He needs to find a gullible mind,

And "There's a sucker born every minute."

 

(2-26-17)