Interior Monologue Number 2

"It's so much fun being president

Of a great country like this.

I love it when people sing my praises,

So everyone can share my bliss.

 

"I can do whatever I want.

The only ones who seem to obsess

About my activities are

What I call the dishonest press.

 

"My people don't give a damn

About my income tax returns.

My people have faith in me

And listen when I express my concerns.

 

"I can hire whoever I want.

And what's more I can require them

To pledge complete loyalty to me.

If they don't, I can fire them.

 

"You can gain so much support

If what you do when critics start pressing

Is cut off access to information.

Confuse 'em all and keep 'em guessing.

 

"When they bring up a Russia connection

And even suggest the word 'collusion,'

I distract them with tweet after tweet

To make a commotion and cause confusion.

 

"One of my favorite perks on the job

Is taking all of my paid vacations.

I also love having the power

To cut off any investigations.

 

"My business empire continues to grow.

Conflict of interest? Bah, that's bunk.

Don't believe it when the media

Say my approval ratings have shrunk.

 

"All of my success up to now

Adamantly underscores

One of my favorite sayings, and that's

'You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.'

 

"And when the people take you to court

For stiffing them or trying to screw 'em,

Use your billions of dollars to pay

Lawyers to help you countersue 'em.

 

I love to have my fans in Congress

Eating out of the palm of my hand.

We have to merely yell, 'Fake news!'

When something doesn't go as planned.

 

"Regarding international affairs,

They say I'm awkward and not well versed.

It isn't about the rest of the world;

It's all about America first!

 

"Any group that gives me money,

Gets my support all the way--

From dangerous climate change deniers

To all my friends at the NRA.

 

"When my critics complain about

Anything I say or do,

I love to go on TV and say,

'I'M the president; not you.'"

 

(7-5-17) By Bob B