"Give Me My Wall"

(Can be sung to the tune of "King Herod's Song" from JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR)

 

Oh, I feel a duty to my donors and my base.

If I don't act, Rush and Ann will say I'm a disgrace.

I pass laws…to titillate my fans.

I hate it when dissenters disagree with all my plans.

 

So give me my wall, my huge, giant wall.

It's a promise that I made.

Join me in my wall crusade.

Come, hear my plea.

Come on and do it for me.

Be nice and give me my wall.

 

You don't know how hard it is to work with people who

Don't appreciate all the terrific things you do.

My great wall…will be a tour de force.

And little Stevie Miller will be satisfied, of course.

 

So give me my wall, my huge, giant wall.

If people starve, well, Uncle Sam,

I don't really give a damn.

It feels so nice

To snuggle with ICE.

Come on and give me my wall.

 

Some say that my wall is useless; they don't understand

How its usefulness will help us keep out contraband,

Druggies and rapists, and all those other sorts.

I will get my way if I keep stacking all the courts.

 

So give me my wall, a huge, giant wall,

That stretches along our southern border.

Don’t say it's too tall an order.

I'll go to town and shut the government down

Unless you give me my wall.

 

Oh…yes…please…

Give my me wall, my huge, giant wall.

Five billion bucks should do it.

You say that's too much? Aw, screw it!

Putin agrees, and so I beg on my knees:

Give me my beautiful wall!

 

-by Bob B (12-22-18)

Reviews

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Haaaa! This is an absolutely brilliant parody. So clever, ascerbic and on-point. Each verse is filled with poetic gut-punches and astute asides. Now I’ll never be able to listen to King Herod’s Song without hearing your words. It would make a great SNL skit. To bad it’s true! This is one to save.