A Wife's Lament at Christmastime

I tell you it's hard to live with a man

Who's always so preoccupied

With making other people happy,

Especially at Yuletide.

 

Time and again I've asked why he

Prefers to live in this frigid zone.

And then he works each Christmas Eve

While I have to stay home alone!

 

I mean, why this bias of Christmas

With winter and snow year after year

When it's nice and steamy on Earth's

Beautiful southern hemisphere?

 

Don't get me wrong: I don't begrudge

His eleemosynary devotion

To making other people happy.

That's a kind and generous notion.

 

But his thoughts are always on

"The kids," and so, I feel neglected.

And yet I always put on the front

Of being cheerful, cool and collected.

 

Another thing I must admit:

It's hard for a wife whose hubby enjoys

An overwhelming fascination

Or infatuation with all his toys!

You might think the man is cute;

However, I am less enthralled.

He suffers from puer aeternus.

At least that's what I think it's called.

 

I tell him, "Dear, I understand

Your thoughtful desire to do good deeds,

But maybe you are overdoing it.

Don't forget: wives have needs."

 

I sometimes think the worst might happen

Whenever my spirits start to sink.

I have to muster up inner strength

To stop myself from taking to drink.

I'd love to be able to find a place

Where we could spend some time by ourselves.

It isn't easy to live with a man

Who spends all his time with reindeer and elves.

 

Oh, well…I guess it's true:

Every marriage has its flaws.

But try to imagine what it's like

To be Mrs. Santa Claus.

 

-by Bob B (12-25-18)