Welcome to America from the DHS

Greetings from us at Homeland Security.

We hope you had a pleasant journey.

But keep in mind there's no guarantee

That you won't exit on a gurney.

 

You should love our border camps,

Which are still progressing in stages.

We have “subdivided rooms.”

(We don't like to call them cages.)

 

We strive to stifle criticism.

Please ignore our critics' lore.

Doesn't everybody love

To camp out on a cold, hard floor?

 

We provide you with a blanket.

What? One is not enough?

Crowded rooms should keep you warm.

Exposure to germs will make you tough!

 

Lest you feel our detention centers

Are too uncomfortable or stark,

We leave the lights on for twenty-four hours

Daily in case you're afraid of the dark.

 

What? You say you need a doctor?

Come on, beggars can't be choosers.

Toothbrushes? Toothpaste? Soap?

Those are just for wimps or losers.

 

We all want your stay to be

Just as pleasant as we can make it.

True, some have died, but they’re

The weaker ones who cannot take it.

 

If your kids were taken away,

We don't mean to disrespect you,

But since only God knows where they are,

Then we'll let God reconnect you.

 

Locking kids in windowless

Warehouses in our recollection

Is a way to offer the kids

Security and protection.

 

If perhaps you’re seeking asylum,

One little thing might give you pause:

The president is working on

Ways to change asylum laws.

 

We know the whole idea of camps

Polarizes, or causes a schism.

In figuring out what to call them,

We prefer the euphemism.

 

So, enjoy your stay until

The powers that be decide your fate.

If you’re lucky, you’ll get a shower

During your long, protracted wait.

 

-by Bob B (6-24-19)