From the Most Popular Unread Bestseller of All Time

Curses; devils; magic wands;

Talking donkeys; talking snakes;

References to sorcerers;

Angels helping with prison breaks;

 

Bizarre prophets predicting the future;

Flaming chariots in the sky;

Fratricide and patricide;

The dangers of an evil eye;

 

Talking bushes; teleportation;

Exorcisms; magical cures;

The sun and moon both "standing still";

Visits to heaven through visual tours;

 

Soothsayers; seers and wizards;

Giants causing fear on Earth;

Dead folks coming back to life;

A super-miraculous virgin birth;

 

The strangest beasts you've ever heard of;

Divine intervention in wars;

Curious dreams predicting the future;

A lot of talk of harlots and w****s;

 

Food that feeds some wandering folks

And falls from the skies for forty years;

An angry god with little patience

Causing lamentation and tears;

 

Violence and genocide

Commanded that jealous god;

Incestuous relationships;

A man parts waters by lifting a rod;

 

Angels that kill and fight with humans;

Evil spirits possessing swine;

Miracle workers; deadly plagues;

Water turning into wine;

 

Mysterious hands that write on walls;

A star that makes a guiding trail;

A prophet who's cast from a ship and then

Allegedly spends three days in a whale;

 

Voices from clouds; someone who

Can walk on water and talk to devils--

A storytelling itinerant preacher

Whose lessons work on many levels.

 

What's all this? A horror story

Or fantasy novel fit for all ages?

A book by Stephen King? Well, no.

It ALL can be found on the Bible's pages.

 

-by Bob B (6-14-25)