Shell

This is a new version of an older poem.

Shell

All that remains is this hollow shell,
A relic of that one day in hell.
The things I loved have turned to dust;
Even my favorite songs have succumbed to rust.

Stress and worry are the air I breathe,
With jagged thoughts that swell and seethe.
I’ve weighed the steel against my skin,
But that’s a war I refuse to let win.

How much longer can I drift this way?
A ghost in the light, a blur in the gray.
Smiling through a fractured face,
While losing my light in this empty space.

The darkness gains its silent ground,
Swallowing hope without a sound.
So tell me, which mask fits the lie today?
I’m asking you�"what is there left to say?

© Jordan Mandic 2025

Author's Note

Thoughts, feelings, emotions brought up?

Reviews

[♍ Kirstin ♎]

This is really good and you can feel a scense of hoplessness when reading it. I love the line "So which mask should I wear today?" that's often one of my thoughts. But one quick question on the 3rd last line shouldn't the phrase "Every so slowly..." be "Ever so slowly..."

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

A powerful write indeed. Can really feel the emotion in this piece and relate totally. Nicely expressed! Thank you.
Light,
Siddartha

[A.r. Bazian]

hey hey... this is down!
i love it btw!

[Aldora Sparrow]

Wow. The sense of hoplessness and helplessness is clear through every word of this beautiful poem. Some of the rhymes sound forced, but, otherwise, it is deeply powerful and wonderful write overall. Keep up the good work!

[Kristen]

I liked this a lot, nice work.

[Ryan Falzon - Tymon]

This is quite a sad poem, feeling trapped all around.

[LonelySoul]

sometimes we create our own hell,
when we imprison ourselves inside our own shell,
and just when we think we'll never get it right,
a new idea and then we see the light,
let it build,let it grow,
let it shine, let it glow,
then one day before you know,
wings begin to form and dry,
you begin to learn to try,
then one day you'll know how to fly,
as free as a bird in the sky,
because you had become a butterfly

[lamia]

i like it especially the part where you say " so which mask should i wear today ?"

[Tina Kline]

Excellent write on tragic, dark, deeply depressive emotions. It can feel like your trapped in hell with no way out when caught up in this turmoil. It is hell.

[Gandré]

The darkness... what is it? I speak it out. Angst, anxiety.. throw the ego out and darkness is gone. I know, very difficult.

[Bennett Logan]

This is very dark and introspective, and it sounds like you know who you are. That being the case, I can't think of any reason to wear a mask. Have a good one, sir, and keep writing!