�Pickup lines will lose the girl and gain a slap�

A Poem by Marni A. K.

Sonnet for school last year.

Pickup lines will lose the girl and gain a slap,
And for this reason they are ill advised.
So do not tell her you need a map,
Because you are deeply lost in her eyes.

To one it amuses, to the other it alarms,
It may seem good, or maybe malicious.
So don’t tell her she must eat lucky charms,
Because she looks magically delicious.

If you’re lucky, she’ll forget or forgive,
The things you have said to shake her nerves.
So don’t wish you were her derivative,
So that you could lie tangent to her curves.

So as you have learned, as simple as they seem,
Pickup lines won’t get you the girl of your dreams.

© 2008 Marni A. K.

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Reviews

Illegitimate Artist

"So don't wish you were her derivative,
So that you could lie tangent to her curves."
I've never heard that one before! Not that I've heard any of them in person lol.
This is an EXTREMELY witty and cute piece. It certainly made me giggle. Nice Work ^^

Posted 17 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Legion

Damn! You just trashed all my best lines. :)

Just kidding. I never got into pick up lines. This was a great sonnet. I especially liked the Lucky Charms bit and the tangent to her curves bit. Well done.

Posted 17 Years Ago

2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

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Added on February 18, 2008

Author

Marni A. K.

About

I am 20 and entering my junior year at Bryn Mawr. I've been writing since I was in third grade, but I really feel I came into my own with my sixth grade poem called "Nazi" I wrote in Hebrew school (yo.. more..