That Burns, The Deepest

Mom, I hope your enjoy the bitter fruits, which you reaped.

"Anger is an energy"

From the song, "Rise"

By Public Image Limited

1986

You will never know

How your actions have

Fueled my hatred

Which I used

To survive your abuse.

Or the extent

Of this fury.

Which burns deep

Like a fire

Trapped underground

In a peat bog.

Neither water

Nor countless years

Can extinguish.

Even 

During my darkest days

When suicidal thoughts ruled

My soul.

It kept me

Focus

For all else

Meant death.

Spurring me

Into action

Where fear had 

Clouded my judgment.

As it stripped my soul

Until the bare core

Remained.

Enabling the rebuilding

Of myself

Into a stronger person

Who could face you

And say:

"No more".

And walk away

Without looking back.

Author's Note

For too many years, my mom has psychologically abuse me, which has generated an intense anger that borders, upon outright hatred, to her, by me. This is something, which my nurse practitioner has been working with me, in addressing, in a positive manner, by me.

Reviews

[Jack...]

This is so sad my friend. The one person we hope to stand beside us hides in the shadows pointing with disgust. Be strong and walk tall...there will always be shadows, but there will also always be sunlight...bask in it my friend.

[therisa]

Thank you, very much, Jack, for your kind and gentle words of encouragement. Talking or writing about my experiences, with my mom, is hard. My greatest regret is, she can't even accept me, as her child, who is female, not male.

[Jack...]

I feel for you my friend but know, you have good friends here who accept you and that includes me

[therisa]

I know, and thank you, very much, Jac.

[therisa]

Opps, sorry about that Jack.

[Jack...]

No problem my friend. I answer to all sorts of names...