Shattered Hopes

Having an emotional relapse.

Thought
I had my emotions
Under control
Finally.

After years
Of riding
A mental roller coaster.

Who's highs and lows
Would have banned
If an actual ride
As too dangerous.

Until last week
The pendulum swung
In the opposite direction
Bringing chaos.

As wave
After wave of tears
Threaten to swamp
My emotional levees
With the sudden deluge.

Triggering
A tidal wave
Of emotional reactions
Which left me
In a state of emergency.

Washing away
Whatever defenses
I had.

Leaving me
Feeling very vulnerable
To others
However temporary.

As the need to hide
Fills my soul
Like a comforting thought
On a stormy night.

While I sit
Upon my bed
In a fetal position.

Knowing
This emotional maelstrom
Will soon pass
Allowing life to continue
Once more.

Author's Note

On Friday (March 14), I had an emotional collapse, which left me, feeling very vulnerable, needing to isolate myself, from others, as a precautionary move. Hoping to limit its impact upon my body and soul.

Reviews

[Jack...]

Therisa, this is so sad and sometimes we do need to hide out for a while but know when you stand from that self imposed darkness, friends will be waiting to sheer you on. Bravo to this deep and heartfelt poem.

[therisa]

Thank you, Jack, for your support and very kind words. Am slowly, regaining my mental footing, but still have moments, which I feel vulnerable, still. Writing this poem, is my way of dealing with this episode, as part of CBT.