Sand

Young love reminds me of sand

Sand

Touch my bare skin.
Merge with the me and create something new.
As you slip away when i connect with the waves of sweet surrender
Soft gentle and tender

Its almost impossible to leave you where you belong.
I cant remember where you came from
Left some of you god knows where


I swear getting rid of you was a mistake
Let the waves carry you away
One step back and you get underneath my layers of defeat.
I can still feel you scrape my slighty burnt skin.
It keeps on hurting so don't ever begin.


-L.D.C

Author's Note

Please let me know what you think about it

Reviews

[George Coombs]

Beautifully sensitive and engaging writing.You have merged with nature in order toconsider a new state of being where one can learn from experience and then move on. Great writing, do keep writing

[😂]

Great!

This makes escape not only tolerable, but elegant. It evokes nature as the hand which grabs the writer , carrying her into a place she might not have wholey wanted before, but cannot fight anymore. THere might be some grittiness still in her, as she was carried by sand. Perhaps she likes the beach, and/or the sand , its texture, color, smell, just the very sight of it with no prescriptions. Your next stanza eludes to what was done. It's perhaps bitter, but more than likely blissful that you were strewn a place you know not enough about. And the last stanza eludes to some pain. Though I probably missed the mark with this critique. Thank you!

[Danny Coykendall]

Very well written. An enjoyable piece. Keep up the good writing!

[SmittyJas]

A day in the sun and the sand just a day at the beach my daughter says any day at the beach beats a day at the office hands down. So smile and laugh for a while during your time in the salty air at the beach I will not preach Just enjoy the Beach.

[wordman]

i guess our lives are filled with regrets,you certainly described it well

[samparks,sam]

that sweet , touch my mind and heart. like you with poem

[TheMalady]

Quite a sad poem about regrets and as well as the emotion of letting go. I love how you described the feelings akin to the sand slipping away from your hands, it somehow sends a sad feeling through me. Great poem! :)