Black-Blue-Butterfly

About a man trapped and possessed in hell (from Sam Winchester's perspective in the pit - Supernatural TV Show)

Black-Blue-Butterfly

Children and their mothers weep a thousand years,

But the flames will never cease,

Not for the flood that falls down blistered-red-cheeks,

Not for all the screams that ring out; ear-splitting, infernal, decimal peaks.

 

Months pass like lifetimes- and of that I’ve had my fill,

I’ve lived through so many- past the number nine,

Who or what must I be if I am not a wicked feline?

Who or what must I be to bear this sentence- was the fault even mine?

 

I raise my eyes, and high above is a window of light to taunt me

As I dwell in the bottom of this hot and crowded well.

I would wonder of my loved ones; my brother who watched me as I fell,

But the dark voices in my head never leave me- instead in volume, they swell, and swell.

 

Then he awakes, tortured with a sense of black-lust-glory,

A creature tied to me for what have been a few months short of eternity.

He tells me to let him take the wheel, but I fight to stay the course,

My body nearly crumbles from the rage-filled force.

 

I stalk the bars, my reflection in the pools of blood,

I catch glimpses of a man I used to be- he stares back silent; speaks not a word.

I hunger for his voice, but every day he looks upon me with a dark look in his eyes;

He is so sick of me- the new man in the vessel; a monster of wrath and a beast of lies.

 

This in between; this ghoul; this abomination; me,

I was born a second time from a mouth of impossibilities;

From a place of bloodshed and lack of sympathies,

A black and blue butterfly for all the abuse that life has given me

 

I am a shell, and he knows it; he shadows me as I strive to carry on,

Am I passing for the man who hates me? For a broken-hearted lover; for a loyal brother,

For a servant of a God who is deaf to all my prayers; for a pained and fretful soldier…

Or is my disguise as transparent as my wavering soul? Do the innocents look upon my face and know?

Author's Note

This poem is a response to a piece of art on Deviantart.com by the artist Becc-j
Her painting is viewable on this poem's thumbnail picture.
About a man trapped and possessed in hell (from Sam Winchester's perspective in the pit - Supernatural TV Show)