Love is a Stray Mutt

I read from my recently published books on my YouTube channel. Here's the link. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSb3oMjGoHQ

As a kid, maybe seven or eight,
I coaxed cats and dogs home, strays, mutts.
Those beautiful eyes,
sadder than any song I’d ever heard,
tiny claws, noses that smelled the earth.
I believed in fairy tales then,
raised on Mother Goose
and the Brothers Grimm.
I thought we’d all live happily ever after
or get eaten by some strange beast
while learning a valuable lesson.

Mom let them in.
The puppies chewed coffee table legs
while the cats pissed everywhere.
I smiled anyway,
thinking I could clutch forever
in my hands.

Summer came.
I went to Dad’s�"
Iowa Falls or the cattle ranch in Missouri.

Early mornings, I’d find tortoises
grazing in the garden,
chewing lettuce,
chomping tomatoes.
I’d lift them up,
study their grumpy faces,
the underside of the shell�"
a burnt orange sunset cupped in my hands.

I’d name them for the month: June, July, August.
Then I’d build a fence. Claim them.

Next morning�"nothing.
Vanished like the last sip of beer.

They needed their land,
their distance,
their ancient map of vegetation and instinct.
I didn’t know then that life demands freedom.

Summer would end.
I’d head back to Mom’s for the school year.
When I walked in, I’d search the house, the yard,
frantic for the cats and dogs.

They were gone.

I’d ask Mom what she did with them.
She’d look away and say, I found them good homes.
I didn’t ask questions.
I told myself that’s how fairy tales go�"
one way or the other.

I loved blindly, like the grass loves green.
A love without muscle is just hunger.

The pattern stalked me into adult houses,
into women with feral eyes and jagged hearts,
souls slipping into the abyss.
I wanted them,
worshipped them,
studied them like I studied the tortoises.

But booze was my true god.

Vodka. Beer. Whiskey.

Their burn seduced me,
spun me onto the lost, degenerate highway.
I drank to numb the scratches on my soul,
to laugh at the claw marks left by their absence.

I couldn’t take care of them.
I couldn’t hold them the way they needed to be held.
I couldn’t love them�"
hell, I couldn’t even love myself.

They were better off somewhere else.
Better off without me.

That lesson punches now,
right to the gut�"
a Tyson left hook.

Love alone is a stray pup,
a mutt wandering in the rain.
Cats. Dogs. Tortoises. 

Women.
All sent warnings I blew off.

Now I sit with empty hands,
count the lives I failed to cherish,
and finally understand:
love without care
is just another ghastly
Brothers Grimm story.

Author's Note

If this poem spoke to you, there's a longer spoken-word reading with a jazz backdrop on my YouTube channel here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?vxSb3oMjGoHQ

You can find my poetry books on Amazon Its Just a Hop, Skip, and Jump to the Madhouse, Seedy Town Blues, and more right here:
https://www.amazon.com/stores/Thomas-W.-Case/author/B0CL2RKDGX

Thanks for reading, listening, and walking the miles with me.

Thomas W. Case

Reviews

[Rosie E C…]

Well,

This is quite the escapism. I can tell there was a lot of emotional relief after writing this.

There is a lot of bursting through the seams here. A genius choice in words such as “jagged hearts”, “burnt orange” and “ancient map”.

Hmmm, that is refreshing!

I admire the emotional depth in this. Very cleverly written. The style is a bit like a short story in the structure of a poem. Nothing wrong with that though.

[Thomas W Case]

Thank you. Much appreciated.

[red93]

Another plunge into yr Past Thomas, and again there is the telling contrast between the received images of American Films and the stark and true Reality of the 'Land of the Free'.
Exceptional ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Thomas W Case]

Thank you my friend. I appreciate it.

[Chris Shaw]

I drank to numb the scratches on my soul.

Such a terrific line Thomas. This poem spoke to me so much about hunger. About want/need rather than nurture. Fab writing. Raw.

Chris

[Thomas W Case]

Thank you, Chris. I appreciate it.

[John the Baptist]

Interesting how life can send us messages if we pay attention. The animals were silently communicating their need for caring love, whereas the speaker realized he could not even love himself correctly. Life is not mute, as long as we are not deaf.

[Thomas W Case]

Thank you, my friend.

[John Sullivan]

Vodka was my drink of choice, Tom. Cheap, s****y vodka. Crystal Palace, usually. I don't drink much anymore, though I don't believe in alcoholism and recovery the way most Americans tend to. You are doing what any of us can only hope to do with our stories... that is, to tell them. And there's value in that. Always keep writing, though I doubt you need my encouragement on that one. Cheers Tom, you're one of our greats here, I think. Always honest.

[Thomas W Case]

Thanks, John. I appreciate it.

[Lydia Shutter]

"I loved blindly, like the grass loves green." what a wonderful line in this well written poem! Our parents shielded us from a lot of life's ugliness. In hindsight, we realize to whom we should have paid more attention. Your poetry always moves me. Lydi**

[Thomas W Case]

Thank you. Much appreciated.

[ETERNITY]

I will definitely check out this one on Youtube where I bookmark it.
For me it was frogs and rabbits. I loved a horned toad in Texas so much then my mom found ii dead with my teeth Mark's on it. Premonition of things to come? Lol.
You are so inspiring!
Thanks for always being you.
OH!This poem is absolutely perfect! A historical and fascinating write into the life of this great author!

[Thomas W Case]

Thanks. You are wonderful

[ETERNITY]

Thomas W Case, sorry I got inspired and wrote a poem here Don't take it personal because I think you are an awesome man... now.

[Thomas W Case]

Thanks. Much appreciated.