My Dream Story: The Confession of a Music Lover

A Story by shunik

My Dream Story: The Confession of a Music Lover

This is a story I keep as a secret for almost a decade, yet from this very day, this will walk away from an untold story to a dream come true.

You know what’s the best part of being a musician? ‘guess it’s not when you've reached the top and embraced popularity in front of almost thousand and one die hard fans or rock on stage with your own band in your own concert, for me it’s the hard work that you’re into, when you had nothing left within yourself but hope. My name is Riley and this is my story.

I remembered the first time I started to dream, just like my first time to hold a guitar. I was 14 at that time… ..

As I was walking in the leafy ground of Haley Street, my mind started to imagine myself playin’ that white guitar I’ve seen at the mall last week. I was scolded by mom, coz she doesn’t want me to get involved to any music stuff that exist on earth, especially for the Haley’s Academy of Music. So I feel so bothered about it and think of the most effective rebel way to hold on to what I really love. If dad was here, he’ll not let these things happen. I think mom was still hurt about his death and this is her first step to get lost from pain.

Anyway, going back to my road trip, I was still appreciating the environmental-chemical reaction of autumn, until I stumble on a huge thing lying across the way and all of my imaginations blurred out and collapse, all of a sudden. As I caught back my consciousness, my eyes fixed on the large feet lying on the ground from a form of a man. He was dressed in a disorderly manner, with right sleeve ripped, undid buttons and dirty pants. His feet were covered with literally dirty white tennis with messed up shoe laces wearing no socks. He’s a drunkard, definitely, yet it doesn't matter to me now. He needs help; a big help, more than food and shelter. The first time I saw his face, he’s in great frustration as what I predicted on his growing beard all over his cheeks. He became more mysterious than what I expected, probably as when the moment I looked at the object he’s embracing while sleeping on that road. It’s as if it is the only precious thing that becomes his reason to live. That was a huge black inverted V guitar. I only saw it on TV like the one played by Metallica (before mom broke my cd).

The stranger’s wallet was unclosed on the other side. An i.d. was inserted on it with the name spelled T-H-O-M-A-S printed on it. As I approached to pick up the wallet, a sudden force grabbed my wrists and twisted it backwards and I screamed in pain. The man got up. He’s like 5 feet tall in his late 40’s with eyes blackened in anger. His hands still locked on my wrists. My heart started to pound faster and faster, until he finally spoke.

“you’re a thief!”.

I said “no, mister I was just looking at your stuff”; until he finally released me, grabbed back his things and walk away. His feet walked crossed ways. ‘guess he still had his hang over.

That was my first sleepless night. I wasn't sure if dad will be happy of what I am doing but I feel something about music and I need to see him. The next day’s the 1^st audition for the academy, but I was grounded. Mom told me I will not make it. I don’t even know how to play any instrument. Mom was right. I’m dumped. Well, to cut this story short.

I just found myself walking again on the same road in Haley Street. And my eyes never failed me to see the same figure of the man I saw yesterday. I brought him a sandwich and a shirt (which I hope fits him well). He’s sitting by the old maple tree and he never bothered to glance at my presence or to respond on my approach. He’s being so hard, but the sun never sets without him talking. I know he’s too kind to be snobbish. My heart leaped as his eyes brightened up when I offered him the ham sandwich. If I realized earlier how hungry he was, I could bring back as many sandwiches as I can. That instance, he apologized for calling me a thief and his eyebrows curved downward as though he is the most innocent gal in the block.

We talked a lot of things and for some time I feel like he already forgot his damnation he’s into even for just a moment. It was 6pm when my mind keeps on reminding me that I need to go home but I’ll never miss this opportunity to ask him about his guitar that is obviously the reason for my sleepless night. I told him “yesterday, I saw you lying on this place and you were with a nicely shaved e-guitar, was that yours? Of course what am I expect his in a mere silence.

08:00 PM- I was silent in my bed. Mom was not yet home. The day eventually brought me some joy. A different experience I’ll treasure forever. That man, Thomas as I remembered. That’s what I saw on his wallet. I never got the chance to ask his name. that night mom called me and said she had a business trip which means I’m goin’ to be alone for the whole week; which means I’m no more grounded and which means I can see Thomas whenever I want.

The week passed so fast that I forgot about the academy. On the first day, I invited him at home but he hardly agreed. That night, a heavy storm strikes the street so hard. Few minutes later, consecutive knocks awakened me. As I opened the door, I found Thomas shivering to death. From that night, Thomas already gave me whatever favor I want. Then, I exclaimed immediately that I want to learn how to play that thing then pointing at his guitar. And so he said “of course, my pleasure”. That was the first time I truly feel how to be a musician. And it’s like my passion on music becomes official. I also enjoyed meeting Benjamin. It was his guitar name. He always told me that only few people really feel this kind of spirit which lucky for me to have. Human individuals has the innate capability to create music, that even the transportation of oxygen to the different parts of the body has lullaby like the simplest beating of a human heart has its rhythm and beat. This way, people can share, consciously or unconsciously, that innate music to other people. But giving happiness to others means being the music to their lives.

Yes, I remembered every word he said. After almost 4 days of practice, I decided to join the 2^nd part of the Academy audition. That was my first experience to step on stage and perform. And after the performance of almost thousand hopefuls, I never imagine that I was the only one chosen that day; me as a beginner as an amateur guitar player. Well, that gave me the reason to believe in the spirit of music as what Thomas said, which sometimes brought me to think were both pathetic.

That night he made me some sandwiches and salad. I never thought he does have the knowledge in cooking. And the best part was he brought up a bottle of wine. We tossed up high on the moon as we laugh together. I don’t even bother to think where he would get the money. I was just so happy that night and so I immediately fallen asleep.

The sun strikes straight to my face as I was awakened by the murmurs in the kitchen. I heard mom’s voice and my mind immediately screamed THOMAS! I hurriedly leaped out of my bed and ran down stairs. I slid the kitchen door open when my eyes caught Thomas and mom talking so I managed not to get attention. As I hid on the half open door, I realized mom was crying. I hardly heard their conversation but I can see how they knew each other. It’s as if they’re already been together for some time. I don’t know if you call it eavesdropping but I don’t understand any single word they say, so my body was unintentionally moving forward to grasp a sound until I stumble on the floor and the door was now widely opened. The two turned their gazes at me and I was ashamed to death.

“Mom I’ll explain everything, I-.. “

“You have nothing to worry son..

I understand, ..I know.., Thomas told me”, she said

“Do you know each other?”

Thomas decided to leave though mom and I invited him for dinner. I thought he already learned to smile, but the moment he left the house, the same expression on his face was revealed just like the first time I saw him on the road.

We had our dinner in deep silence. I keep on asking mom about how she met Thomas, but she never spoke. If nobody wants to speak up, then I’ll discover it myself, that’s what I thought to myself. I rushed to the old attic and grabbed some huge boxes. There were old clothes, photos and stuff. I scanned on mom’s old photo album and I’ve discovered a school batch photo. I saw dad, Chris on his old school uniform, mom as well and Thomas. They were old friends I guess. I brought the pictures and handed them to mom. The next thing happened, she cried again; and it’s going to be my fault. The next day I decided to find Thomas. I don’t want to give up on what we’ve started. I searched him for weeks but I failed; until I found him on the old Green Park at the far east forest of Haley.

He spoke so little and our conversation lasts only for a few minutes but what he told me,it all collided on my whole being. He said, he and mom were very good friends, I guess more than friends until I emerged at my mother’s womb and everything was gone; gone..after Benjamin and Cassandra (my mom) got married.

How could he blame this 14 year old flesh? I ran as fast as I could with little drops of tears on my cheeks that constantly fading as the wind blows on my face.

I reached home and mom was there. She just stared at me as if she knows what happened. I keep on asking her a lot of questions. Do you really love dad? Or you’re just pushed to marry him because of me? How did my father died? Is it Thomas? That time I saw fear and pain. And then she cried again. Mom told me it’s the right time to for me to know the things I must already know about dad, about mom and about us, just like old movies say. Mom’s story goes like this as she started…

I was at my year 2 in Music School when I met Benjamin. He’s a popular and honorable man of school, coz’ he’s the son of the school President, but since that was a music school as to speak of performance, he didn’t got any abilities, most specifically when being compared to Paul, but these two people were friends. Paul was known as the guitar man of the school. He’s not just good at it; he’s definitely excellent at playing guitar which opens a lot of opportunities for him. When I met Ben, they were already friends. He offered me to audition for their new yet unnamed band. I was good at piano that time. He often called me ‘virtuoso’ (piano player). And at that period they were already writing songs, so I decided to help them and later on became an official member. In my excitement to do our first single, I pursue to finish the song then suddenly Paul visited me at my house and invited me for a celebration. Upon entering the room, I realized it wasn’t just a celebration, coz it’s only the two of us. I considered that night as the most significant part of my life. That night he revealed his true feelings for me. You know what’s so memorable about that night? Coz finally I knew the truth from the questions that really haunting me at night. And in that hour, I know he understood me without showing what I felt, without saying I feel the same way; with only us in front of each other; no more questions remained unanswered, but this is not a tale-of-sweet-fuming-fairies or you call it a fairy tale coz this story doesn’t end this way. I know I must not to be with Paul that night, in that room and in that moment holding close to him, coz I’m already bound for Ben. My father already set our wedding before I knew it, just to save the farm; the farm as the only memory of mother so I had nothing to do with it. Family over me seems like a very hard life-doctrine.

During our first band performance, I hardly sing the song I wrote. I was crying backstage before our performance and unknowingly, through my emotional turmoil, I speak out all the truth to Paul.When it’s our turn to perform, the three of us were in a complete silence. Paul looked at me so hard. He slapped his guitar and walk away. The crowd was in a “boo!” Ben and I were left there, letting my dreams to fade away. From that moment on, I completely forgot everything about music. And there you are Riley and every pain inside me was changed to hope.

“So that means you never reconcile with Paul?

By the way who’s Paul?” I interrupted.

“no son, his real name’s Paul Thomas”, said mom

“Yes”.

“Did Thomas and dad remain cold to each other?”

“Well, not really yes, but after Ben’s death, Paul put all the blame to himself.”

“Why mom?”

It started after the performance night. Paul knew he can’t do anything about us, about me getting married. After he walked out the stage, the recording management decided to give us a second chance. This is because they really wanted Paul to be on their Production. The bad thing is, Chris and Daniel were against it. They were our great intruders which means that the management chose us over them. Due to this, Chris planned a plot against us, so immediately after marriage and as we walk on the road to fame Ben died at the concert night because of a fire accident. Ben went to Paul’s room to apologize and Chris was there. He started the fire on Paul’s room not knowing Ben’s the one inside. Paul blamed himself for the tragedy of his friend until now, he still blames himself.

It’s really unfair to put the blame on music. With his guitar named after him, I know Thomas had his regrets. I can imagine how good they were as friends. I know dad’s happy where I am today and I wish I could still twist Thomas’ mind-set about that stupid regret. I never heard mom playing piano, but after she was released to that old secret, I heard her in the morning tryin’ to play a composition. I was wondering what song she made for Thomas.

“If you really love him why can’t you ran after him?”

After all, everything was said and done.

I know where to find Thomas”.

Finally I encouraged her to go after him, but that happiness didn’t last long. We found Thomas on the ground just like the first time I saw him on the road; but this time he was terrible. He looked unconscious and bloody and half-alive. I know how mom was hurt at that time. As we rushed him to the hospital, I can’t think of any word to say, but all I’m thinking is not to end my story that tragic. I had nothing to hold on to. And if Thomas was taken away from me, I can’t take it no more.

After few weeks of sleep Thomas managed to recover from his emotional breakdown. I was so glad to bring him his guitar which I’ve polished last night. As I walked towards his room, I realized mom was already there. They were talking in deep seriousness. I guess they’re okay. I immediately greeted them and show Thomas his newly styled guitar. He’s in a complete silence but his lips curved to smile.

“you don’t need to do that. That thing is your property now. Take care of it as a friend and there you will learn how to make a dream come true,” said he.

I feel like I was flying in deep flabbergast and I hugged him until mom interrupted.

“Another thing, you don’t need to call him Thomas.”

Her eyes were searching as she continued.

“Ben is not really your dad.

Remember Riley, you’re made up

of true love and you’re the best music

that ever came to me.

I know you’ll get your

father’s skills when it comes

to instruments”

“You’re my music Riley and your father’s”

We were laughing together, though tears emerged to form on my cheeks. ..

Thomas as well..

..more satisfying, more than winning in the academy of music.

It’s true, Thomas is my music.. … I mean dad.

-the end

© 2016 shunik

Author's Note

Author's note:
This is a story within a story. To add spice on the plot, I've interchanged the personalities of the A1 guys and put some mystery and a lot of symbolism. Any corrections for grammar,feedbacks and reviews to this story is very much appreciated.
Have fun reading!
this is actually an entry to a fanfiction contest of A1 Writers on facebook
=]