SKIPS

even heartbeats skips..

SKIPS

By: christine zapanta andes

 

In the middle of sunrise

When birds turn to kiss their nest,

And wind so soft, it trembles to my skin,

I step through that door

To watch my fate slightly shaded

With mist of last month’s rain.

Then I stop.

I looked at a stare in a million gaze

and you’re there.

You’re the you

who opened the door,

real as the world

driving to and fro,

the gaze who told

the inmost I cannot tell nor hear

but my heart speaks of,

the deepest.

Author's Note

..

Reviews

[...]

A lot of really good lines here...dreamy, actually :)

[shunik]

dreams actually creates my words.
thank you for the review

[Heromen Selena]

This is a really great poem! The shortness of the lines make the poem breathe in all the right places and slows down the pace so the reader can fully experience the sensations that you are trying to make them feel. I love the comparisons to the summer and rain. It gives nice imagery and sensory details that the reader can follow. Something that I noticed was the you forgot to capitalize "you're" after the line "I looked at stare in a million gaze and you're there." I don't know if that was intentional, but I notice it because after every other period you capitalized the word. Other than that, I think that this is an excellent poem :)

[shunik]

the "you're" thing was a typo. thanks for the ask and the review :)

[Calibaster]

That's really great! Like, freakin' good! I really liked the last line, with the heart, it was really "deep" :) get it cause it said deepest ... Nvm. ;)

[shunik]

thank you if you feel that way.
:)

[Calibaster]

You're very welcome!

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

Felt as if every secret was laid out on the table.

[shunik]

thanks for the review my friend

[Coyote Poetry]

You said so much in so few words.
"the gaze who told
the inmost I cannot tell nor hear
but my heart speaks of,
the deepest."
The above lines are amazing. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[shunik]

thank you sir

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Sami Khalil]

"and you’re there.
you’re the you
who opened the door.
real as the world
driving to and fro,"

A soft and romantic poem make you realize...Excellent...:).................

[shunik]

thanks sami

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:).........

[Chris]

It is such a GREAT moment when this happens... and you have to remember how to breathe.

I understood THAT moment... and you captured it well.

[shunik]

yes.thanks for the review