COLDER

than the west wind

with a twist of sunrise,

rainbow is a cold rain

in a mist of west wind,

the birds still sing 

in the shadow of a subway road,

 I stepped back 

and you are colder

with the breeze of the west wind

I lit the memory 

to keep it warm

because you're colder 

between a dream and an open eye.

Author's Note

a fading dream from a memory

Reviews

[Andrew N. Farrens]

the birds still sing
in the shadow of a subway road,
I stepped back
and you are colder
with the breeze of the west wind

I love the way this rolls, leaving the reader in the grip of its self-made imagination.


I lit the memory
to keep it warm
because you're colder
between a dream and an open eye.

I hella understand this. This is a great poem.
Res Ipsa Loquitur
ANF
Drew Kazinsky

[shunik]

it is well appreciated. thank you :)

[SUGATA M]

The poetry has a strong visual image.

[shunik]

thanks for the review my friend :)

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

The sights and sounds were spectacular. You paint marvelous
pictures with words.

[shunik]

thanks for the review :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest and direct thoughts in the poem.
"I lit the memory
to keep it warm
because you're colder
between a dream and an open eye."
Hard to bring to life a dead flame. The above lines I enjoyed. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[shunik]

thank you for the review :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Paul Pruett]

That is what I so love about good poets. The way they structure words, combining images in such compact phrases. This is a small wonder in a big world of dreams.

[shunik]

indeed it is.. thanks for the review

[Paul Pruett]

You are very welcome. Keep up the good work.