I Wasn't Even There

For a contest

He looked at me
With his little pouting eyes,
Saying, "Daddy, don't go"

One foot out the door,
I threw him a flying kiss,
Saying, "Baby, don't cry"

It's been ten years since,
And I'm back home,
Finally, I'm back home.

But the hardest part of leaving
Was coming back.
For in coming back, I found:

A bullet through the wall,
A rickety old house,
And a note that said, "I hope to see you again, daddy."

Beside the note was
a picture of us,
The paper frail and old.

Outside the house
Was a cemetery stone,
Written "1995-2005"

Inside my heart was a heavy thought,
"My son left me,
And I wasn't even there."

Reviews

[Lasune]

This poem tells such a sad but thought provoking story, very well wrote.

[Treble]

Thank you so much!

[Chris]

Sometimes you're the child, sometimes ...the parent. Life has a way happening regardless of the timing.

[Treble]

Very true, very true

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

So moving! Felt the sadness at the end..
Nice play with the words but the plot took the spotlight.
Liked it.

[Treble]

Thank you! Glad you liked it!

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Wow! its sad, but still, beautifly written. A part of it i can relate to... "The hardest part of leaving was coming back" when you're gone from a place/person for a long time, and then you go back...well, it feels like you've gotta start everythin all over again...and its hard. Nicely done.

[Treble]

Thank you! Yes, it is incredibly sad. :( Did you catch how the boy died?

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Yes, that was the point where i started crying...he shot himself. Correct?

[Treble]

Yes, he did. You started crying? That's so sweet! I asked if you caught that because that's the saddest part of it.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Exactly, and i could feel the pain of losing a loved one in this poem...and that all the more since i lost my love. Well, he did not die...but he and his family moved far away...and i miss him more and more every day. Anyways, long story. Point is, i can live the pain.

[Treble]

Aww, I'm so sorry! Hope you feel better, but I understand if you don't.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Nope...it happened a few weeks ago...but i aint feelin better. Anyways, i will get used to it. Thank you:)

[Treble]

:) :) :) :)

[PoeticChico]

This was really hard to read, triggered a lot of emotions. It means you wrote something special, Well written. Good Job!

[Treble]

Thank you so much! Would you mind reviewing some other poetry as well?

[PoeticChico]

I definitely will, when i have time :)

[Treble]

Thank you!