Out of Heart, In Mind

I am tired of you meddling in my cerebral affairs

Adding expense to already needed internal repairs

You under mind the authority of rational thought

Interfering in areas you clearly should not

Whats in mind should stay out of heart

Ignorance is bliss until you're blind and torn apart

If I know what is best, I'd rather not have to feel it

A heart serves better purpose when I don't have to heal it

Don't mind my business, your office is in my chest

Keep me alive and bleeding, I'll do the rest

Reviews

[Pete Langley]

I really like the theme of this piece, Keely, with it`s air of practicality. I has a gentle humurous quality to it, too. I like " A heart serves better purpose when I don`t have to heal it". I still feel that you have to concentrate hard on improving the socalled "flow" ( I hate that word as a poetic label but in this case it applies) Normally,in your case, this will involve precising some of your lines. P.

[Elle Thompson]

third line: *undermine

this is solid, it has serious presence, and I think it is beautifully concise. It is precise and forceful, good work

[John F Carver]

And to think you invited me to read, and all of your stuff should be so read as this.

[kublakhan27]

An interesting and compelling piece...very rich in its interpretative potential...nicely done :)

[A. H. Pinley]

Good write!

[MoriartyMesa]

"Ignorance is bliss until you're blind and torn apart"
Print that on a T-Shirt and you have a million dollar walking advert for your work.


Nice job.

[quinfinn]

seems the senses are duking it out in your vessel here...i love this part of Keely Jane. it shows your vivid imagination and demonstrates your quality in penning verse, well done!

[Lover Of Words]

I love this great job

[Phoenix]

well done

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Another go0d flowing piece with great pathos. One little correction (sorry!!!):
'You under mine' not mind. Which improves the poem in another area as you use the word mind again :)