Completly Together

i sit
alone.
with the knife in my hand.
drag it across my arm
the familiar path
watch the crimson red liquid melt down my arm.

i sit
in front of the mirror
i see my reflection
a face
with large, dead eyes staring back
squinting, hoping to catch a glimpse of hidden happiness.

a face
only begging to be pretty

to be loved

and i lay on the floor
and a tear hits the tile
so cold
and i breathe......
struggle to breathe, wish i could stop breathing.

......

the last drops of blood are washed away
the scars will never be found
but i remain sitting
breathing, yet a lifeless soul
pleading to be taken away
watching this scheme ive sewn together
fray at the edges

i try to put it back together,
was it ever completely together?

Reviews

[Keevan]

Captivating poem. I don't think I've read one quite like this. I thought it was beautiful, keep writing.

[Silent Soul]

"Do not fear those who can break down this body and destroy it. Fear those who, once this body is destroyed, can take that sweet silent soul and cast it into eternal torment." F.E.A.R. correctly. ;)

[PaperHearts]

Wow, very intense! I loved how suspenseful and totally captivating your poem was, and I could really envision everything that you described in my head. I liked your phrase about 'breathing, yet being a lifeless soul'. I could really relate to that feeling, and I think that you chose the right sentiments to evoke that. The only other thing that I have to point out is that for your poem's title, you've misspelt a word; 'Completly' should be 'Completely'. xD
Nice write,
~PaperHearts

[Hollywood]

I love how you say "the familiar path". It's a very retlatable poem, well written. I did enjoy it.

[ORBLE]

I absolutely love the start, middle and end. I just love everything about it, you brought out the emotions well and the description of their actions was in such depth I felt I was there. It reminds me of some of my bad times in my life. It was simply brilliant. Well done!

[Skull]

Wow, I like it. 100/100

[rockinmiley555]

this is sad, emotional, and anything in between. i like how detailed it was :)