Behind These Eyes

In front you see what everyone sees

This weird, crazy girl

But beneath that

Behind these eyes

Lies sorrow

and pain

That no one could understand

 

You try to comprehend

You try to understand

But no one can

No one sees the little girl

Crying--no-- Screaming out in pain and fear

She sees so much

Knows so much

Lost so much

 

And i don't let her take hold

Only in the tears that i shead does she emerge

 

You don't wanna meet the girl

that lies

Behind these eyes

Author's Note

grammer, spelling, ignore

Reviews

[Daydreamer54]

Wow! This was very deep! I liked it! :)

[Dom]

Very good poem! There was a lot of emotion in it. I enjoyed it :)

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

Wow...i really felt the emotion here...you did a wonderful job...there is alot of ppl that hide themselves and show what they want others to see...i can really relate...sometimes i dont even know myself since i have hidden so much stuff...just mostly my tears though.
Great Job :)

[Wildecat]

This is a very good poem, thanks for sharing.

[J. Ackson Jr.]

A spectacular piece of human nature. Looking inward as if you're looking into the mirror of your eyes. I love the concept of this poem. Well written. It actually reminded me of a poem by bukowski called bluebird (and that's a good thing, it's my favorite poem by bukowski)

Great Write! =)

-j.

[Legion]

Do me a favor. Look around you at all the people that fill in your life and try to understand them instead. We often don't seem to think others understand us, but in reality we do not understand them. If you learn this in life, you will go far and grow immensely.

[Misa]

l'll just jump right into this,s hall l? The first line seems unrelated to the rest of the poem - it's a physical sense, but l'm not sure what it's referring to. However, the second line relates well too a lot of people, l think. Specially highschool students, though that may not be what this is aimed at. Anyway, the one thing l didn't like was the "no one will understand me" aspect in a few of the lines. Not a major issue, but it did stick out to me as a cliche, since almost everyone feels like that. At the same time, it could be used to make people relate to it if expanded.

"Knows so much
Lost so much
And knows too much"
these lines echo too much. l would consider taking out the original knows, and leave the second one in.

"And i don't let her take hold" - could do with just "l don't"
"shead" = shed?
other than those nitpicks, l like this. quite a bit, actually.