Chapter 20

“What are you doing?” Toby asked.

“I’m emptying out this box of your clothes so we can reuse it. And it’s making me focus on one thing instead of my stepdad leaving. Did I wake you?”

“No, I’ve been awake. I’ve been watching you keep busy.”

“How much more clothes are you bringing over?” I wondered.

Toby got up from where he was laying. He touched my arm to reassure me that he understands what I’m going through.

“Toby, I can’t stop. I need to keep my mind busy and focused.”

“I understand, Lucy. Look at me.”

I looked up into his hazel eyes and melted a little inside. I put his hands on my hips and my arms around his neck. We stood there kissing until Linda interrupted us.

“I’m going to get breakfast and bring it back for you and Toby. Tom will be by shortly to drop off Kyle.

“Thanks, mom. Toby and I will be at his parents’ house moving his belongings into boxes. We’re going to start once Kyle is here and you are back.”

There was no point in taking showers as both of us were going to get sweaty. We moved out into the living room so Kyle could see that someone was home. Toby had to tell Kyle about him being there permanently. When Kyle came through the door, he was so eager to see Linda.

“Hey, Kyle.” I called.

Kyle came back out and into the living room for Toby to talk with him.

“Toby needs to tell you something and I think you would like to hear this.”

“Kyle, how would you feel about me moving in and living with your sister?”

“I would like that very much. You and my sister are meant to be together.”

Kyle went to Toby’s open hands and gave him a hug instead. He also gave me a hug which meant a lot to me. After getting a hug from Kyle, Linda was walking up the step to get into the house. Linda put the food on the table to free her hands. Toby was the first one to dig into food as he was hungry from the night before. Both of us wanted a head start on packing because we had to go to Ken’s house also. Ken’s work was excited to donate boxes for us. We split up the work so each of us were doing our shares. I was packing while Toby was deciding what he wanted at my house. It took Toby forever to decide and it was fun to watch him. Once Toby finally decided, we filled up the last box and started to pack his truck up. The sun was beating down on both of us and making us sweat more than ever. Heat and sweat wasn’t gonna stop us.

It was around noon time when Ken offered us some lunch. We were only an hour into packing when we sat down to eat. Ken was cooking on the grill so he would have dinner for work. Toby had his dad’s meaty burgers while I had a vegetable salad. We didn’t take long eating as we wanted to get back to work. When we returned to my house, Linda offered to help carry boxes in so it would be more help for us. The boxes were being stacked in my room for the time being. It was a huge mess in my room now but I was ready to fix it. I sighed and Toby took it as a signal of fatigue.

Toby gave me a sweaty hug before he went into the shower. I made sure he wore the same outfit so he wasn’t dirtying more clothes than need be. I started with the boxes on top and moved downwards. Toby was relaxing on the bed while I was getting my room in order again. Box after box, everything was starting to come into place. It was my time to shower and I wanted to take it during dinner as I wasn’t hungry. The big salad I had at lunch was very filling. We all went to bed around the same time because the majority of us didn’t sleep well the night before. Tonight was the first night of Toby living with me. And the first night, I didn’t want to be near Toby. Toby was confused on what I wanted. I turned my back from him and held Mr. Penguin close to me as I started to cry.

First, it started off soft but then came on strong. Toby reached out his hand for comfort and I ignored it. He curled up into my back and pulled me close. I only slept for a couple of hours as I kept waking up. Each time, I wanted to be near Toby but this was something I had to deal with on my own. The week past by and I made sure I called Brett but when Linda wasn’t around. The weeks were passing by and it came to the day where Linda had to report to her camp. She was leaving this afternoon from the nearest airport. I was also a couple of days away from meeting my real father. Between me, Kyle and Toby, we managed to say goodbye to Linda before she got on the plane. It was painful for me because now I’m taking her spot as a mom. Kyle and I hugged each other as we watched the plane take off. Toby had an arm wrapped around my neck to pull me and Kyle close.

I was now officially Kyle’s guardian and it was going to be a challenge for me. Three days from now, Brett, Toby and I were going to meet at the mall for the first time. Toby was helping me get by for now. My eating has turned to more vegetables like salad and less junk. I’ve also been cooking more and taking Kyle to the beach with me and Toby. All of this has been taking Brett off of my mind and meeting at the mall. The night before the meeting day, my anxiety was catching up with me. Toby had fallen asleep before me and left my mind to go frantic. I rested my head on his chest and Toby woke from deep sleep. He swore and then realized that it was me.

Just by feeling my face expression, Toby knew that I needed him. He gathered me into his arms and told me to curl up. I took deep breathes before I finally went to sleep. Toby was the first one who woke up the next morning. The anxiety was starting to come back before I was even awake. My body was shaking a tad bit but I wasn’t cold. I was able to wake myself up but my heart was racing.

“Lucy,” Toby held my body still. “It’s alright. Try to calm down. Take some deep breathes.”

I sat up and tried to relax but I’m scared to physically meet my dad. Toby was rubbing my back which was actually helping me. Tom was going to be taking Kyle out and about while Toby and I were going on a “date”. Heather was going to stop by to readjust the dress that she bought for me when I went to church for the first time. The dress was too big on me but with Heather’s help, she made my dress fit to my slim body. But Heather also added some extra touched but she left the rest for me to do. I decided that my hairstyle would be to have my hair up in a bun. I wanted to show Brett my true beauty. The shoes that went with the dress were somewhere in my room as I don’t wear them often. My true height needed to show and I rather match a pair of flip flops than the high heels. Toby dressed in a nice pair of khaki shorts with a t-shirt. I was now ready to show Toby what I looked like.

A knock on the door interrupted my concentration but Toby was in the living room and answered the door.

“Getting all fancy for your date?”

“Yeah. Lucy loves to look her best so why not me?”

“Enjoy.” Tom said as Kyle was ready to leave.

As soon as I was certain that Tom and Kyle had left for good, I started to walk out to the kitchen. Toby was watching the squirrels chase each other when he heard my flip flops. He turned around to see me. I always find a way to either please him or “wow” him with my beauty. Toby loved his sister for what she did with my baby blue strapless dress.

“How do I look?” I asked as I twirled around for him.

“You look amazing.”

Toby came closer to me to get a closer look. He was amazed at how beautiful I am. I smiled at him and wrapped my tanned arms around his neck. I kissed him softly before I asked if he was ready to leave. We drove to the mall with the windows down as it was a nice day out. Toby parked close to the entrance of the mall. It was me who joined my hand with Toby’s for comfort and support. I asked Toby to not be with me after I introduce him to my dad. I wanted to talk with him alone but I wanted him nearby so he can witness what has been said. He agreed to what I had said before he pulled me into a bear hug. Based on the description that Brett had said in his letter, I was able to find where he was sitting.

Blood was rushing to my cheeks which was causing me to blush. I wanted to cry because I was happy to finally see my dad. He caught sight of me when I was walking towards him.

“Brett?” I asked when I got closer.

“Yes.” Brett answered.

The tears started rolling because I couldn’t believe that this was really him.

“This is my boyfriend Toby.”

Toby and Brett shook hands and then went to grab some lunch as I sat and reserved our seat. Brett wanted to chat with Toby while inline to grab drinks and sandwiches.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you.” Brett started the conversation.

Toby was going to make it clear to Brett about some things.

“I want to make you clear on something.”

“And what is that?” Brett asked while he grabbed the bag sandwiches.

Toby was carrying the drinks back when he warned Brett.

“Don’t hurt her because I will be watching. She’s not comfortable with just meeting you. I’m only here for protection.”

Toby is splitting half of his sandwich with me along with a bottle of water for each. He came to my table and delivered my food before going in for a kiss. I was able to see the hazel pop out of Toby’s eyes. He sat behind Brett so he could hear our conversation. I took a bite of my sandwich and chewed it slowly. My arms were starting to shake because I was nervous. Brett turned his head so he could chat and chew.

“How have you been?”

“I’ve been better. I’m actually a part time mom.”

“You have children?”

“No. I’m now…Well; Toby and I are now Kyle’s legal guardians because my mom was deployed overseas.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“It’s nothing. I’m getting use to it. Toby and I want children some day. He actually lives with me now to help out with Kyle.”

That gave Brett an idea. He was almost done with his first half of his sandwich. By that time, I had taken a second bite of my sandwich and I was almost finished with my bottle of water. I was getting the same feeling that I was getting whenever I’m in the mood for Toby. Brett’s had went from resting on my knee to up my thigh. It was making me uncomfortable and I need to make it clear. I removed his hand that was resting on my thigh. He saw the first-warning look.

“Tell me something interesting about yourself.”

“Well, I love to bowl. I’m very competitive when it comes to the sport. I love to read. I tend to do a lot of reading during the winter as I can’t be outside.  One thing that I love passionately is to write. My ideas came to me in a daydream.” I concluded.

Brett was getting distracted by my beauty and it was getting quite creepy. Out of curiosity, I turned around to see Toby with that hard core look on his face. I went to take another bite of my sandwich when I noticed something unusual about Brett. He had asked me to join him back at his house. My response was that I needed to discuss with Toby as he is my ride. I texted Toby and asked to meet me in the bathroom. I got up to go to the bathroom with Toby following after. My biological father is started to freak me out. I started to pace when I got to the hallway of the bathroom.

“I’m sorry Lucy, but that man is a creep. I saw where his hand was going. He is such a pervert.” Toby was going off.

“I’m going to lay down the rules when I go back out there. His hand felt so rough unlike your soft hands. I’m sorry Toby, but I have to give him a chance.”

“I know you do. Did he invite you back to his place?”

“Yes, he did. I would like to go alone but I want you to have your phone on so I can call you and you can hear our conversation.”

“I can deal with that. Lucy, please be careful. You don’t know what this man could do.”

I sighed before I rested my head on Toby’s chest. He wrapped his arms around me and then sighed himself. I gave him a kiss before I went back out to confront Brett. When I was walking towards Brett, all he saw was pure beauty. This time around, I sat across from Brett so I could see Toby and be eye to eye with Brett.

“Something is wrong if you’re sitting across from me instead of next to me.” Brett piped up.

“Yes. Something is wrong. I’m sorry but you’re related to me and I don’t understand why you’re hitting on me.”

“You caught me. I’m sorry, Lucy. You are very attractive and I made a wrong move.”

“I’m taken if you haven’t noticed and it’s kinda awkward that you’re hitting on me.”

“I know it is. Are you gonna come to my house?”

“Yes. I will but there are going to be some rules. Rule #1 do not make me do something that I do not want to do. Rule #2 do not touch me inappropriately and rule #3 act like a father instead of treating me like a guest.”

  “I agree to those rules. Are you ready to leave?” Brett asked.

“I am ready to leave.” I said as Toby walked up to grab my hand.

I made sure that I rested my head on Toby’s shoulder while we were walking to Brett’s Sedan. It was this dark blue color that was really pretty. The anxiety was crawling from the pit of my stomach to the bottom of my throat. Brett unlocked his car and opened the car door for me. I turned into Toby for the one last whiff of him. He brought his face down to mine for a kiss. It was a slow meaningful kiss. When he released me, I looked into his eyes for a smile to appear on his face. One did as I went back for one last kiss. Before Toby let me go, he whispered something into my ear.

“Be careful.”

I nodded in agreement before I climbed into the car. Toby shut the door and watched Brett back away. In the back of Toby’s mind, he knew something was going to happen and it wasn’t going to be pretty. Because I was starting to get sleepy, I forced myself to stay awake. We were at Brett’s apartment before I knew it. Something was fishy and I didn’t know what I was getting into. No one else was living with Brett except for himself. He told me to make myself comfortable and would grab me a drink. I sat on the couch while Brett was in his little kitchen. What I didn’t know was that Brett was mixing a “special” type of drink. He came to the couch with two glasses. I accepted mine and took a sip. It was a bit fruity and had an aftertaste. The aftertaste was so familiar. From this drink, I had the feeling of cozying up to Brett.

He had accepted me being so clingy to him that he had downed all of his alcoholic drink. The last thing I remember is being on the couch and accepting a drink. I was able to feel what was going on but my head was out of it. Brett’s hand was now in between my legs instead of my thigh. He was starting to become hard as he was fingering me. I felt myself going out of it as Brett was entering me. When Brett was done with me, he lowered my dress back down and called Toby from my cell phone. At first Toby was confused and then it made sense in the end. Toby found me asleep on the couch when he got to Brett’s house and it wasn’t making any light bulbs go off. My dress was going to stay on as I wasn’t coherent to what Toby was saying. The alcohol has worn off by the morning.

There was this awful taste in my mouth so I got a glass of water to wash it out. My head was hurting and I wasn’t clear on what it was hurting. The last thing I remembered before waking up in my bed was being at Brett’s house. I had smelled so awful that I immediately went to the shower. I was so thankful that Toby took care of Kyle while I was out of it. When I undressed, I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary until I got into the shower. I had looked down and saw a whole bunch of bruising around my private area and in my inner thighs. I don’t even know how I got them there but it was something I had to make note of it to tell Toby. He was awake when I got out of the shower. I started a load of laundry while I was wrapped in a towel. Toby went to use the bathroom real quick while I made my way back to my room. I was getting ready to be questioned.

“Would you please explain why you reeked of alcohol when I drove you home?” Toby asked.

“Alcohol? Toby, I don’t drink. I have never in my life and I never will. It smells awful and has an aftertaste.”

“Yes. Alcohol. You were passed out when I picked you up.”

I was starting to put pieces of the puzzle together.

“Do you mind looking at something?” I asked Toby.

Toby agreed to look up my towel to look at the bruising. When he dropped the towel back down, there was an aggravated look on his face. I was trying to figure out what it was but I couldn’t remember.

Toby screamed. “THAT SON OF A B***H!”

It startled me a bit but I think Toby came to a conclusion of how I got the bruises and why I reeked of alcohol. He walked to where I was standing and looked me right in the eye.

“I know what happened.”

“What?”

“You’re not gonna like it.” Toby said.

“Just tell me please.”

“Brett must’ve offered you a drink of some sort and it contained a high level of alcohol. Enough to make you pass out and not remembering. He made sure you were knocked out and took advantage of you. Those bruises on the inside of your thighs is a sign of rape. Brett raped you Lucy, hard enough to leave bruises on you.”

I was stunned at what I was hearing from Toby. So stunned that I had to sit down. Why would he do that to me? How could I not notice the signs of what Brett was going to do? He seemed like a cool guy and all. I needed time to think this through and it wouldn’t be helpful if Toby was with me. I got dressed quickly and acted like nothing had ever happened.

“When Kyle wakes up, make him breakfast and get him dressed for the day.” I gave Toby directions.

He understood how upset I was and was afraid that I was going to hurt myself. I went out into the backyard to be away from everyone. I sat on the edge of the deck and thought. Thought about what Toby told me. Thought about what happened with Brett. Reality was starting to set in. So much anger was going through me. Once Toby got Kyle situated, he came out back to see how I was doing. I was staring out into space before I finally spoke.

“How could he do this to me? Why me?”

I turned to Toby for answers and he was the one who was staring into space.

“Brett was doing what he did to your mother before you were born. I saw the sign when he put his hand on your leg and started to move upwards. I think he’s a sex offender but I don’t know. He wanted to take advantage of you but didn’t want me around.”