Upside-Down Sun

Turn my sunshine upside down

hang shadows in the sky.

brighten the night with sparkling heat

shoot rays of pristine light upward

pierce into endarkened sky.

 

Turn my sunshine upside down;

let's all grow wings and fly.

Author's Note

... not for review - this was written in '04 when I was too young to know better :)

Reviews

[Don Coorough]

I find a surreal quality that is enhanced by the final two lines. Let's make possible everything impossible, that's what it says to me. It seems like a tight metaphor in that sense. Anyway, I enjoyed it, whether or not anything I mentioned was intended. Art often lies in the subtle decrees of fancy we never ourselves analyze, no? Peace. - EllisD

[Caleb Benton]

even in '04 you were thinking so far outside the box you lost track of where it was.

[bluessadmood]

i think i know what you mean,there could not be times darker than these,try to brighten the wight with every kind of light ,or else lets grow wings and fly for this night is too dark for me and i will flee

[holly]

Nyah nyah na nyah na - we're going to review it ANYWAY! Just to let you know that even though the poem may not be your favorite, the reader gets to see an active and well-described imagination at play. Really, isn't that what writing is all about - the releasing of ideas and emotions onto paper? We always hope to write in such a way that we push ourselves to a new level of maturity. But that doesn't mean that our earlier work is invalid. This was a breath of fresh air. Congrats.

[Arthur Henn]

Turn my sunshine upside down;
let's all grow wings and fly.

I liked this one, these two lines made me smile.
Thank you for sharing.

Arthur Henn

[Laura E. Aranda]

Very imaginative! I like odd pieces...cheers, lea

[Wolfwind Words]

To bad! :) This was a cute little pick me upper! A breath of fresh air. needed something like that on a day like today.

Sometimes what we do when we don't know better, becomes our greatest treasures.

Aaron Maycroft