Laura's Joy

Hi! So much has changed. No longer headed for the altar after December of 07, but as of Feb 08, readying for seminary studies in missions and evangelism. After a really trying time during the winter where I really had to be held in the palm of God's hand until healing began, things have finally started to pick up with a job, continued place to stay, and barely making ends meet (with a lot of help from my friends, and sadly, from the government). Back to the old life as a single, and sometimes it makes me despair, but I tend to push away those who would like to be close to me. Until I learn the balance between being with people daily and being accountable, yet still free to be myself, I guess I have to be a lone eagle. I have produced a huge body of poetry since I came out of the doldrums in early April. And, I have learned a lot about what love is, and what it is not by falling in love with someone totally different than the person I intended to marry, and then having it crash and burn. Yet, I would never have regretted a single moment. Now, at almost 43, I can say at least, for a brief shining moment, I felt loved and was able to really love in a sacrificial way that left me a much better person. Amazing to get to that age and find that you can love someone that way, even if it doesn't get to turn out like a Hollywood ending. I will always be grateful I shared any time with him at all. He taught me the difference between a child's understanding of love and how a woman should look at the world and the man God has given her (for whatever time) to love.

I am back in my old denomination, and very happy there. I have tremendous support from friends there, and can't imagine going elsewhere. I am getting back into the encouraging business, but need the same from others. I have learned that you can't give when you're empty. So, if you need encouragement, or if you'd like to be encouraging, or if you just want to share your writing, please let me know.

Blessings and Grace,
Laura Kathryn