the crying game

the crying game

 

 

 

listening to raindrops kiss the roof

of my imaginings

 

i still feel the tears of you leaving

when you'd hardly arrived

 

poncho dripping with regretful goodbyes

you asked me not to follow,

your hoodie pulled down over your eyes

 

you backed away slowly

through puddles of questions

neither of us could answer

 

i did love you once

and i remember it with each drop 

that taps the roof

 

of my imaginings.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

5/17/16

Reviews

[V]

A blue and hurting poem which made me feel deeply sad and being left with a notion of heartache, still moments after reading. Clear, direct and painfully expressive.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Vanessa.

j.

[Linda alexander]

Emotions are painted so clearly, excellent metaphor, great job done

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Linda...

j.

[Linda alexander]

Take care........

[David Scott]

This is rich with emotion Jacob! I love the rain and I can feel the memories of the raindrops as well.
Very touching write.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, David.

j.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I love the rain on the roof...soothing...never was one for mourning however over lost love or loved ones...never had time to grieve for anyone...life always demanded my attention. The shrinks say that's not a good thing but it is what life has demanded of me. Maybe a higher power decided it was not in my best interest?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and sometimes life just never gives a chance to mourn, or feel real joy...

thank you for sharing, Fabian.

j.

[Daydreamer]

The unspoken, unanswered questions are what really gets me in a boggle.
Yet the not knowing of what could've been inspires me to keep reading and writing.
Beautiful imaginings, Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful review, Daydreamer.

j.

[Anima Akuffo]

This reminds me of a song that goes..

Rainy nights and memories go together
And with every drop of rain
I feel the pain
I could almost hear my pleading
On the night you were leaving
But i might as well have tried to stop the rain..

Good piece.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Anima...
j.

[Cascara (aka Sprint Goe..]

''and i remember it with each drop
that taps the roof

of my imaginings."

i like these words - they provide a visual to how you feel

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your visit and kind words, Sprint.

j.

[m.s.early]

Like an old tin roof in a summer rain. Tin won't galvanize you know. not like a heart if you aren't careful. In the bible they like to use the word "waxing". Beware of your waxing heart. Put a tin coat on it until the pit pats put it to sleep. I always sleep better under a tin roof during a summer rain.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful response, m.s.

j.

[GalaxyGhost]

Wow, this poem hits home as letting go of people in our lives is hard, especially if that person was close. Ever since going into college, that has happened a lot. New friends that only last a semester. Sure, there's Facebook, but it doesn't replace that friend's actual presence.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, technological friends will never replace the real ones.

thank you for your insightful words and how you relate to this one, Galaxy..

j.

[GalaxyGhost]

You're welcome!

[Einstein Noodle]

https://youtu.be/S13ZLMNQBjc

I thank God for the cleansing rain ...so relateable and your sound effects are fist rate ..heard saw and felt every drop ...the intensity of the falling raindrops completely up to me ...and my imagination ..what a great poem ...
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and i love that song by the Temps...saw them in concert at SIU...the sound system was so screwed up we couldn't understand one word they sang...yet they were beautiful to watch dance...

great concert, regardless...and thank you for your very kind review, E.

j.

[Einstein Noodle]

too bad about the sound ...we recently went to a Neil Sedaka and a month or so later The Marcels ... they are in their 60s and 70s and all sang with those same old voices ... dancing and carrying on like they were 20 ... Neil was especially incredible ... so sad about the sound system ..in those days they sang and played so one could hear every word ...
E.
ps i especially like the poncho effect in this poem ...