Willow Street

A Chapter by Stephie.Santi

Sophie moved into the apartment on Willow Street on a rainy Thursday afternoon. The paint on the door was chipped, the building leaned slightly to the left, and the mailbox rattled when the wind hit just right. she didn't care. It was cheap, and she needed a place she could disappear into.

The bathroom mirror was old and warped at the edges, but there was something honest about it. It didn't pretend. It reflected the dark circles under her eyes, the faint scar on her knuckle from the day she punched a wall at fourteen after leaving the hospital.

Her father went to sleep that day, he never woke up.

Sophie leaned against the sink, listening to the radiator hiss. She tried breathing exercises Dr.Jackie had taught her. In for four. Hold for four. Out for six.

Nothing happened.

Her phone buzzed on the counter.

Evan: " Did you get home okay? "

Her chest tightened, her pulse racing. She stared at her reflection, wishing it could tell her if she was about to mess everything up again. She typed back quickly, too quickly, and deleted it three times before finally pressing send.

next chapter

© 2026 Stephie.Santi

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Reviews

JayG

• This is my therapy.

I won’t dispute that, but...while writing it, and getting it out where you can see and react to it is a good thing, why call it a story and post it as a “story?

• Sophie moved into the apartment on Willow Street on a rainy Thursday afternoon.

From a reader’s viewpoint, someone the reader knows nothing about, of unknown age, in an unknown city, in an unknown year, moved into an apartment they may or may not share, on a rainy day.

If rain is so significant that it must be mentioned in the first line, shouldn’t the reader know why? Shouldn’t they know why this person wanted to move from the unknown place they had been living?

My point is that while you’ve provided some facts that are meaningful to you, who have the hows and whys of it, without context the reader cannot be made to WANT to read more. And readers are volunteers, not conscripts. So, what you give them must be meaningful on an emotional level, to them, as-they-read.

So...if you want to write fiction, you need to dig into the hows of writing it, because our school-day writing skills are useful for the reports, letters, and other nonfiction that employers need from us, but useless for fiction.

Why? Because nonfiction explains, while fiction’s task is to entertain the reader by making it seem the events are happening to them, as-they-read. And as an emotional goal, it requires emotion-based writing skills.

They’re not hard to find nor hard to learn. In fact, if you Are meant to write, you’ll love the learning. So...try this:

Debra Dixon’s, GMC: Goal Motivation is a warm easy read, that often feels like sitting with Deb as she talks about writing.

So try a bit of it—the excerpt—for fit, on Amazon.

Jay Greenstein
Articles: https://jaygreenstein.wordpress.com/category/the-craft-of-writing/the-grumpy-old-writing-coach/
Videos: https://www.youtube.com/@jaygreenstein3334

- - - - - - - - - -

“Good writing is supposed to evoke sensation in the reader. Not the fact that it’s raining, but the feeling of being rained upon.”
~ E. L. Doctorow

“Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.”
~ Alfred Hitchcock

“It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”
~ Mark Twain

Posted 1 Week Ago

• This is my therapy.
 
I won’t dispute that, but...while writing it, and getting it out where you can see and react to it is a good thing, why call it a story and post it as a “story?

•   Sophie moved into the apartment on Willow Street on a rainy Thursday afternoon.

From a reader’s viewpoint, someone the reader knows nothing about, of unknown age, in an unknown city, in an unknown year, moved into an apartment they may or may not share, on a rainy day.

If rain is so significant that it must be mentioned in the first line, shouldn’t the reader know why? Shouldn’t they know why this person wanted to move from the unknown place they had been living?

My point is that while you’ve provided some facts that are meaningful to you, who have the hows and whys of it, without context the reader cannot be made to WANT to read more.  And readers are volunteers, not conscripts. So, what you give them must be meaningful on an emotional level, to them, as-they-read.

So...if you want to write fiction, you need to dig into the hows of writing it, because our school-day writing skills are useful for the reports, letters, and other nonfiction that employers need from us, but useless for fiction.

Why? Because nonfiction explains, while fiction’s task is to entertain the reader by making it seem the events are happening to them, as-they-read. And as an emotional goal, it requires emotion-based writing skills.

They’re not hard to find nor hard to learn. In fact, if you Are meant to write, you’ll love the learning. So...try this:

Debra Dixon’s, GMC: Goal Motivation is a warm easy read, that often feels like sitting with Deb as she talks about writing.

So try a bit of it—the excerpt—for fit, on Amazon.

Jay Greenstein
Articles:  https://jaygreenstein.wordpress.com/category/the-craft-of-writing/the-grumpy-old-writing-coach/
Videos:  https://www.youtube.com/@jaygreenstein3334

- - - - - - - - - -

“Good writing is supposed to evoke sensation in the reader. Not the fact that it’s raining, but the feeling of being rained upon.”  
~ E. L. Doctorow

“Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.”  
~ Alfred Hitchcock

“It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”  
~ Mark Twain

Rating /100

0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Yellow Submarine.

I'm glad you are not over writing, or over explaining. I do that. I've been told to allow readers to fill in a lot of blanks. Maybe you're a natural?

Nice start. I'm intrigued.